Si Legis, Es Sapiens.

Yeah, It's Because I'm White.

2011-11-17T09:54:00.001-08:00

Salvete,

As a professional, I have never been called racist except by students as a half-hearted retort to save face.

I mentioned in the previous post that we are reading Poisonwood Bible. That's right. We are reading a novel that is an Opera's Book Club selection, champion of human rights for the Congolese, denouncer of traditional gender roles, and embracer of inter-racial-social-cultural communication and relationships. How dare we.

I must admit, this parent must be a lot smarter than I am if they can read the back of a book and truly know the essence of what their child is learning. Anyone who can read a 105-word synopsis and know that young adults should not read the whole novel is far more perceptive than I, who have read the entire book as well as the criticism of it. It is outrageous that students should learn to embrace other cultures. It is barbaric that students should read about self-discovery and the complicated experience of being female in a male world. It is shocking that students might read a book that challenges white dominance and the legalistic strictures of the church.

So, I will call this parent, and I will arm myself with the mantra of student responsibility. Ultimately, however, I will give in. I know that a phone call is not going to change this parent's mind.

Yes, mother of my student, I am white.

Yes, I was raised in the culture of white privilege.

Yes, racism exists in this world.

But no, you do not get to decide that I chose this book because I am white. You do not get to make that generalization about me. You can make the decision that because it is set in Africa, your daughter cannot read it. However, you will be wrong.

And as I tell my students, it is OK to be wrong, but it is not OK to stay wrong. I hope your heart changes.

Valete,
Magistra

LOLWUT???

2011-11-17T07:21:00.001-08:00

Salvete,

I assigned Barbara Kingsolver's Poisonwood Bible as an outside novel. Every Thursday, we have literary circles where they talk about the book in a structured way in small groups. In this week's section of the novel, the village gets attacked by a ton of flesh eating ants. Whether or not it is a literal ton, I do not know, as there are a lot of ants but ants do not weigh much.

Anyway, here:

Student 1: "If the villagers are afraid of the river, why do they run there when the ants come?"
Me: "Maybe get eaten by crocs, or definitely get eaten by ants. Weigh the options. Which would you choose?"
Student 2: "That's when I start throwing rocks!"
Me: ...?

I'm still laughing, but the student has his back to me, so he doesn't know.

Also heard during literary circles:

Student 2: "I never said I was going to kill you."

Student 1: "Do you not have any common sense?"

Student 1: (Regarding shortening quotes by leaving out words and using elipses): "Just put the first letter and the last letter in quotes. They'll figure out what it is."

Valete,
Magistra

"Siren Song" by Margaret Atwood

2011-11-03T13:21:00.000-07:00

Salvete,Today, I had the kids read the awesome poem, "Siren Song" by Margaret Atwood. As an activity, I had them write two questions as original posts in a forum I had set up for their use. They were two create their two questions and then respond to two other questions that their classmates had created. I know from doing this activity in the past that they never want to stop at two comments, because they are teenagers and cannot hold in their opinions once formed.

I wanted to share some of their question and responses with you. I hope you enjoy them as much as I did:

Q: Why would Ulysses not stuff his ears with wax?
A: Because he didn't have wax.

Q: What could have been a way to avoid the siren's song, not including the way Ulysses did so?
A: Kill the sirens.
A: Bring women to kill the sirens.

Q: Would you save the men who fell overboard?
A: Yes I would, depending on who they were. If it was Justin Beiber...NO!

Q: What man would you save?
A: Anyone I didn't dislike.

Q: Who is telling about the "Siren Song"?
A: One of the sirens.
Response: How do you know? Please give text evidence.

That last one is a future teacher! Just kidding. But that is what we say to them...Please give textual evidence!So cute.

Valete,Magistra

Caution: Whining Ahead

2011-10-28T11:56:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

I have not posted an angry blog entry in a while. It seems to me like it is time to rectify that.

Issue #1: It is Friday, and this is Texas, so I understand that football is more important than instruction. I get that. What I do not get is why people cannot take care of their business. Our pep rally was featured this morning on Fox 4 News, and only yesterday did Fox let us know that this would be the case.

Our administration, who is actually very good about letting us know things, told us as soon as they knew yesterday morning that our entire Friday would be flipped on its head. I suppose because they are Fox 4 News, they think, "Oh, I don't mind changing the schedules of 3000 students and 200 teachers." What they fail to realize is, high schoolers are like puppies. They need routine and structure, or they go positively nutty.

Issue #2: Our administration let us know yesterday morning about the aforementioned pep rally, but there was one thing they forgot to clarify. Yesterday afternoon during third period, they let us know that the students should check in with us first thing and then be collectively released for the pep rally. I hope I am not the only one who sees a problem here. Many teachers do not check their email until the end of the day (as we are busy teaching), and are not able to deliver a last minute announcement to their classes. The teachers I spoke to told their children to report straight to the pep rally in the morning. Some students took that to mean that they could opt out of the pep rally and arrive late to school. This morning was a giant mess of students not knowing where they were supposed to be. Honestly, it worked out fine and we went with the flow like we always do.

Issue #3: I have a new teaching partner this year. Everything has been going really well. She is very organized, great with the kids, and so kind as to let me know in advance changes in the schedule. I have greatly enjoyed working with her so far.

However.

She arrives late every day, because (as I previously understood it) she has to get the volley ballers started in the mornigns. Why their head coach cannot do that is beyond my understanding, but I Go With It, because that is what we do here. This morning, she was not there (per usual), but (not per usual) we were expecting a set of guest speakers to come talk to our kids. Please note that she had invited these speakers and had left instructions for the front desk to notify her when they were here.

Knowing that my partner is habitually late, I went to the front and ensured that the wonderful secretaries knew to call me to fetch the guests. I love taking care of other people's responsibilities.

I called my partner around 7:45 (the time we are supposed to be here per our contract) to ask if her guest speakers could use her laptop so that I could grade on mine. As it turns out, my partner was still at her significant other's house, and had no idea where her laptop was or was not, and oh, she would swing by her house and see if it was there on her way to school. I have no idea what time she got here, because (after I met her guest speakers and got them situated), I took our kids to the pep rally.

Issue #4: My partner fell asleep during our guest speakers' presentation.

I. Cannot. Even.

OK. Maybe I am too uptight. I have been told that before. I think the word was "anal". However, I do not think that advance notice, arriving on time to work, and being awake on the job are tremendous, unfulfillable expectations. They seem like normal things to expect of a human being, much less someone who is shaping the future of the nation.

I recently gave up on being an adult since I am not sure that "being an adult" actually exists. However, if we are going to expect things of the kids, we should also fulfill them ourselves. If we do not set an example for them, then what? How can we convict them to be on time when we are not on time ourselves? I woke up rather late on Tuesday, and still managed to make it here by 7:45, since that is when I am contracted to be here. Go me. Guess what being on time gets me? Additional responsibilties to compensate for the people who are late and who receive no consequences.

Valete,
Magistra

Death and All of His Friends

2011-10-20T11:33:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

This is sort of a continuation of the previous post.

As some of you who (probably don't) read this blog may remember, I had a student (let's call him Christopher) attempt suicide last year. He shot himself through the chin, and fortunately did not have enough sense to angle the gun to do the job thoroughly. His lack of attention to detail led to him destroying his face and tongue, which had to be reconstructed through many painful surgeries. I went to visit him when he was in the hospital -- mouth wired shut, trach tube in, and down to a skeletal 95 pounds.

Late last week, Christopher opened my door and came into my classroom with the same goofy, optimistic smile that I remembered. His face is a bit different, and his teeth are not what they once were, but he still gave off that air of confidence and adolescent joy that he usually did around me. He hugged me and overwhelmed me with his repeated thanks of coming to see him in the hospital. He told me that not many people did, and that he appreciated me taking the time to visit. I was honestly surprised he remembered, as the number of drugs he must have been on at the time was probably substantial. He told me about the surgeries yet to come and told me he would come see me again.

Yesterday morning we got an email that an 11th grade student, though not one I know, had died at home the previous night. Word got around that it was suicide, though I have not had any official reports as far as the cause of death. The sorrow I feel for his family, teachers, and classmates connects directly to the sorrow I felt when I heard Christopher had shot himself last year. I am thankful that my student lived, and so sad that this other student died. These kids still have so much to do. Heck, I still have so much to do, so many people to meet, so many people to love.

So to you, my non-readers, I say, value the people in your life and know that your life is valued by others. Taking yourself away from them is not a solution, it is a creation of more problems. Take pity on those of us who love you and stay with us a while longer. Things will get better.

Valete,
Magistra

Tardies and Tartness

2011-10-20T10:25:00.001-07:00

Savete,

It has been a while since anything really compelling has happened in my classroom. A few little incidents have occurred, and I will record them here today.

One of my very good students (shall we call him Roger?) walks into my class about five minutes tardy. I had seen Roger go in for a tardy during first period, as I was waiting in the office to attend a meeting. He walks into my room third period, and I ask for his pass. He does not have one, and tells me so as he shoves his backpack onto a computer table with controlled frustration. I ask him to please go get a tardy and he tells me, "I really don't want to do that, Miss. I'm already having a bad day." As I sigh with dejection and sorrow for the impending office referral that I sense, I ask him again to please go get a tardy. He thinks for a moment and says in a tone that does not reflect compliance, "OK! Here!" He pulls out a sheet of white paper which is - lo and behold - a tardy. Now, he saw me saw him get a tardy first period. He knows I am not stupid.

And yet...I look at the time stamp on the tardy, and it is most incorrect for the circumstances of this moment's particular tardy. I let him know that I realize what he is trying to pull, all the while maintaining my Sugar-Plum-Fairy-Smile-of-Goodness-and-Grace. I tell him he has tied my hands and left himself with only two choices. I can write him up for non-compliance or he can get a tardy. I "beg" him to get a tardy, and then move on with my life. I continue class (a lecture over the glorious topic of Archetypes) as I pull out an office referral form. He sees me do so, and I see him thinking. He interrupts my lecture with a sad but not unpleasant, "All right, Miss," and exits the room only to return with an appropriately time-stamped tardy several minutes later.

This experience was quite a show for my class, as they had never seen me have to discipline anyone outside of the occasional redirection. During my confrontation with Roger, they were watching with baited breath. Would I become angry at his defiance? Would I lose my temper? Would I let it slide because he was having a bad day? No, no, and again no. This is not personal. There was no reason to be mad. There was protocol to follow, and I followed it. All ended well, and Roger served his lunch detention the following day.

A few days later, a student (shall we call him Travis?) hung back once it was time to switch classes and waited for the rest of the students to leave. I had seen him do this before, usually to discuss some issue he was having with some class or teacher. Today, that issue turned out to be me.

I realize that my teaching style is what one might call "blatantly honest about real life and what I will and will not put up with." I make no efforts to spare the feelings of my students when it comes to how things are meant to run in my classroom. I have discussed before in this blog my policy for extra credit. I usually give the students two bathroom passes per 9-week semester. Each bathroom pass is worth 10 points of major grade credit.

On Wednesday, when I was explaining to the students how turning in bathroom passes works, this is what I said: "Make sure your name is on the passes, or I'm going to throw them away, because that is not my problem." They laughed a little and we moved on.

So, after class Travis stayed to tell me this: "Miss, did you know that sometimes you come across a little...well..."

I filled in for him, "Harsh?"

He blushed and nodded. He said, "I don't mind it so much, I kind of like it, but some other students might react negatively."

And I said, "Well, that's up to them; I just tell it how it is." He thanked me and left. So weird.

There was one more thing, but I think it should go in a separate post.

Valete,
Magistra

So a Lawyer Walked into a Bar...

2011-10-07T19:13:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

I meant to write this down a few days ago, but had not had the chance due to homecoming week taking over everyone's life at school. I wanted to take the time to write this blog entry because I never want to forget the event that inspired it. I believe that the following is a great reminder of why the job I do is important.

I got to school on Tuesday and met a student waiting for me. She is a good one, not the brightest, but definitely full of potential because of her desire to learn.

Somehow we got onto the topic of what she wanted to do after high school. She told me she wanted to be a lawyer. In the past, students have given their reason for wanting to be lawyers as they love to argue. While arguing is certainly part of a lawyer's job, there is much more too it (I would imagine, anyway).

When I asked my student why she wanted to be a lawyer, I expected the average answer. However, she said to me with such conviction, "I want to be a lawyer because I love justice."

"That's a good reason to be a lawyer," I replied.

She said to me, "Yes, miss, did you know that in Africa, if a man dies, his wife gets nothing? It all goes to his family? That is not right. They built that life together, and then she is not considered part of the family. No, miss, that is not right. I want to go back to Africa and I believe that I can make it right if I am a lawyer."

I hope that she does not lose that conviction. She said those words with so much belief, so much longing. She has lived in Africa before, and seen the injustice with her own eyes. Talking to her gave new meaning to what I do every day. I want to give the kids the skills to succeed, whatever that looks like for them. If they love justice, let them be lawyers. If they love healing, let them be doctors. If they love education, let them be teachers. And let me be ocean that helps their ship sail past the horizons of their dreams. Let them be "sailors of the world, bound for all ports," and let one of many currents along the way.

Valete,
Magistra

Let's Get Personal.

2011-09-29T12:01:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

Something one hears about work is: Keep your personal life and your work life separate.

I have always prided myself on being one of those teachers who never takes work home. I tell my students, "Work is work, and home is home." Some teachers grade at home over a glass of wine--or something stronger--and I have always imagined that if I did that, by the end of the evening, everyone would have A's. In your dreams, students.

On the other side of leaving papers at work to be graded, I also try to leave emotions at home to be forgotten until I walk back in the door to my charming abode around 4 o'clock each day. In my last post, I discussed being ON at work, so that one wears one's teacher hat around the kids. My particular metaphorical teacher hat looks something like a fedora--very cool--with some weird feathers and maybe a music box attached. The aura I try to portray around the children is quirky, organized, and interested in them. Quirky I am. Organized I also am. Whether or not I am interested in them is less certain. Either way, they generally see me as a personable and forgiving adult who will never rage at them. I may get serious for a few minutes while I discuss their bad behavior, but I immedately snap back into happy-go-lucky Magistra as soon as the berating is over.

Such snappage leads to one or more students a year suggesting I become a professional actress. In my more desperate moments, I entertain the notion, but then remember how actresses do not really get summer/winter vacations unless they are very good at what they do, or insanely hot, and I do not imagine myself to be either to the necessary degree.

Digression ended.

All this to say, lately I have been having a problem keeping the two separate. I feel that I am coping with the seepage in an unhealthy way. Some stuff is going on in my non-work-life, and has quietly leaked into my work-life thoughts. How do I deal? I put all of my ON energy into my kids during passing period or direct instruction at the start of class. Then, I launch them into whatever activity I have engineered for them that day. Do not misunderstand me here. The activities that I make require cooperation, critical thinking, sufficient homework, and plenty of reading and writing. However, once they have embarked on their activity, I sit at my desk and do a whole lot of nothing.

Papers get graded, things get done, but I feel that I am using work as a time to process all of the non-work things.

It is wearing me out. Before, I had work wearing me out at work, and home wearing me out at home. Now, I have work and home wearing me out at work. There, I compensate by ignoring my kids for the majority of the class period, which in turn makes me feel guilty. At home, I also compensate by systematically using every dish and leaving them all dirty, in addition to refusing to fold my clothes. Problem? I think so.

Anyone who knows me well knows that when I let things get messy, it is time to worry.

Solution? Quit work or quit life. Priorities! Just kidding. But I will figure something out. Until then, thank God my kids are really well behaved.

Valete,
Magistra

Like a Lamp

2011-09-19T08:58:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

As a teacher, one has to be ON all the time. What I mean by being ON is this: whatever mood you were in when you came to school, that mood is irrelevant. Figure it out. Get it together. Love the kids.

If one has a desk job, one can schlump a little bit in the cubicle and grouch around half-way through the morning until coffee time. If one has a job requiring manual labor, one can pour the hurt of the day before into the new day's physical task. If one works in retail or some other wage job, one can take "smoke" breaks or become consumed in a task.

Teachers have to be ON all the time.

This is not to say that other jobs are not taxing in various ways that teaching is not. I am not here to offend (well, maybe a little) or to qualify, just to talk about my thoughts. Get your own blog if you take issue with my opinions.

You may have had teachers who chose not to be ON. They were hateful towards the kids, or let their personal issues run their classroom. The best I can do for my students is to be ON every day, and be the same every day, as much as a human being can. I promised them that the first day of school, and I try to maintain that promise.

However, I have found that being ON from 7:15 to 3:45 takes a toll on my peronsal life. Either I treat my peers/parents like my students out of the habit of being in the teacher persona, or I allow the supressed frustration/grumpiness leak out into personal relationships. I find myself giving so much at work that I take too much when I am home.

Lately, I have had more migraines than usual. Since school started four weeks ago, I have had two severe ones, the aftermath of which has lasted for two or more days. Such frequency is not typical of my migraines. I have been forgetful and distracted, and have been having heart palpitations more than usual. All are signs of stress, insofar as I can tell.

Despite stress, or being ON, or whatever, I love my kids so much. They are incredible every day. I am fortunate to have them in my life. I have already learned from them this year, and they have learned from me. They feel safe in my class, and they feel smart.

Valete,
Magistra

If You Teach It, They Will Come.

2011-08-21T17:45:00.000-07:00

And if you do not teach it, they come anyway.

Salvete,

The kids are coming tomorrow whether we are ready for them or not. I have seen ample Facebook postage over the last couple days -- the heaving of sighs, the failing of courage, the braving of novelty! All from teacher, parent, and student alike. Parents taking their young men and women to college, exhausted moms returning home with school supplies, and the self-reassurance in order to remind...we can do this!

Do this we can. Do this we must.

The last couple weeks have been a roller coaster of emotion. So, I am going to take a moment to wander away from the normal topic of this blog to share a personal reflection. I lost someone very dear to me. No one died, so do not freak out. He just disappeared. Internet friends sometimes do that. Naturally, because I over-think, I tried to decipher a way to stay in touch. Could I use Facebook? E-mail? Skype? Mutual friends? I felt myself grasping at anything I could think of to hold on to this person's friendship. When I went to counseling last week, I expressed my anxiety. Her advice? Let him go. If he wants to go, I cannot change him. I can only respect him. I know it was hard for him to go, and my pursuit might only make things more difficult for him, which is the last thing I want. I have no clue if I will ever speak to him again.

All of the above led me to a few places. First, I realized that I could not control the situation or his decision, nor should I try to. Now, do not believe for a moment that I am not still waging war in my head daily about things I could do to change what has happened. I fight that battle every day -- I draft e-mails in my head that I will never send. In keeping with the spirit of this blog, I will try to relate these realizations back to the classroom. Teachers, we cannot control these children. Their lives, the decisions they make, the people they hang out with...it is nice to think that we are all-powerful and can control the success of the students. However, no matter how many times I hear, "but you can salt his oats!" tacked onto, "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink," I still firmly and immovably believe that the success of a student ultimately lies in that student's hands. Can I force my friend to contact me? No. Did I ensure that he knows I am here (before he left)? Absolutely. It is in his hands.

Second, loss is something we do not often feel acutely. Allow me to qualify. Loss such as this -- the actual creation of a void in our lives -- does not frequently happen to the average working middle class person. People in our current society of connectedness and social networking just do not disappear. The last time a memorable void was created in my life was when my grandfather died. They buried him, and he was gone. It might be overly dramatic to compare the intentional disappearance of my internet friend to the death of my grandfather. However, to one not used to losing, the sudden and unexplained loss of a friend cuts deeply. I mentioned such veins of networking as Skype and Facebook. Those saviors and artificial continuers friendships which should have long been over are of no use to me here. I cannot go to his house -- I do not know where he lives. I cannot call him -- I do not know if he even has a phone. Thus, I have lived with an ache of knowing. Knowing I may not ever hear from him again. Knowing he has chosen to withdraw from a world we shared for over two years. Experiencing this loss is a reminder for me that some of the students I am going to meet tomorrow have experienced more loss in their short 15 years than I have in my whole life. They are young, so tender, so lost. I have means of coping, but how do they cope? Who has taught them? Perhaps I can teach them. It is my job, after all. I am not accustomed to losing, but lose I have, and I intend to make the most of it.

Finally, my friend's disappearance has reminded me to cherish what precious little time I have with my other friends. Unless someone is jaded, one does not expect disappearance. What would I have said if he had allowed me more time to say it? And, if I had said more, would his going have been better, easier? Would it have made any difference? Or would it have been perceived as sappy, departure-driven sentimentality? Does it even matter?

What I know is, I am sad. It is ok to be sad. It is ok to mourn loss. Elizabeth Bishop wrote a poem that has always resonated with me, but has especially comforted and sweetly saddened me over the last couple weeks. It is called "One Art," and it talks about losing things. Bishop starts out discussing how we should practice losing, starting with little things (keys, a watch), and then increasing in scope (continents, rivers, cities). She ends with the stanza that follows, about the greatest thing that we can lose in the scope of the world:

--Even losing you (the joking voice, a gesture
I love) I shan't have lied. It's evident
the art of losing's not too hard to master
though it may look like (Write it!) a disaster.

Losing a friend is a far greater loss than losing continents, watches, rivers, or keys. So here I "Write it!" I will not die from this loss. But I will remember it, and I will not forget my friend. Work beginning will be a welcome distraction from the option of drowning in loss. It is ok to lose. It is not a disaster.

Have a good first day of the new year.

Magistra

2011-08-18T19:32:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

What a week it has been! And it is only Thursday. Today was just awesome. If you are one of those people who thinks that one's job cannot bring joy, find a different career. You have been lying to yourself.

As I worked in my room today, I noticed kids in the hall. I remembered that they were due to pick up their schedules today so that they could find their way in the new building. So that they knew I was available for help, I propped open my door. Inevitably, a few stopped to say hello. Seeing my former students brought so much joy to my heart. Even one with whom I had issues here and there (a very good student with a chip on his shoulder) came by to see me. The students were generous with the hugs and open with their questions about everything from summer reading to class locations to you-name-it. I really cannot believe I tried to leave and go to graduate school.

The new students I met today also had parents in tow. Meeting parents is always such an interesting experience. Our principal reminds us that parents do not keep their best kids at home. The parents send us the very best they have, even when that "very best" is not so great. The parents all asked good questions and I was pleased as punch to meet them.

One of the really exciting things about working with AVID (besides that the kids are almost guaranteed to be good) is that I get to know who they are before the first day of school. I get to help interview them, hand select them with a group of my peers, and I get to help ensure their success. A weighty charge, ensuring success.

Back to work I go tomorrow to plan until I fall over. I can't believe they pay me to do this!

Valete,
Magistra

Here we go again.

2011-08-13T07:50:00.000-07:00

Salvete.

School ended. I worked graduation. And now summer is almost over.

Graduation was interesting. I got to wear my regalia for the first time, which made me proud of myself. It felt like my own graduation, in a way. On my original graduation for my Masters of Education, I had to work, so I did not walk (nor did I really want to). This more recent experience of watching those kids walk across the stage was the best graduation ceremony I could have wanted for myself. In a way, it really was my graduation. My first ever group of students graduated from high school. I taught mostly freshmen my first year (in Houston), but I did have some sophomores in my two Latin classes. I keep up with five or six of them on Facebook (gasp!), so I have gotten to see their status updates -- waiting to hear from this or that college, attending senior prom, and experiencing the joy and anxiety that come with a new chapter of life. At my current job, where I have taught sophomores from the beginning, I had repeaters who were junior level age-wise. They too graduated this year.

As I sat with my row (row 13 pink! best row in the place!) and watched those people walk across the stage, I felt genuinely proud to have been a part of their lives. I do not know where their roads will lead them. For some of them, the only thought in my head was, "None of us ever thought this day would come." They were the ones who seemed to feel that their only mission in life was to make us miserable. However, there they went, there they walked. I hope they are ready.

The summer has sped on as I have done my best to slow it down. I have tried to savor every day of freedom, knowing what is coming. I suppose I am ready for the new year. For the past two weeks, my ever-present and ever-vivid dreams have been riddled with nightmares of disobedient students, humongous class sizes, and failed lesson plans. These phantoms have done nothing for my confidence, but I have tried to push them away in the morning light. It will be excellent to see my colleagues on Monday for our staff development, to see my desks neatly placed, to make copies, to walk the halls of a school I have loved for many years -- long before it was my employer.

And even if I am not ready, the children will come anyway. Whether or not you teach, they will come, so you might as well teach your heart out for them.

Believe me, I intend to.

Valete,
Magistra

Nothing Gold Can Stay.

2011-05-25T14:05:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

I have surrendered Anime Club. It's for the best, you know.

We have this week and next week to meet, then we will be done for the year. And I will not be the sponsor.

Will I have less weirdness to blog about? Probably. Will I regret the choice to no longer sponsor Anime Club? Maybe.

But I doubt it.

In other news, it is nearly summer. While the rest of the world is getting out of school this week or next week, our district felt compelled to extend school until June 9th. Whoever was responsible for this situation obviously cares greatly for the district's budget, because the longer we keep the chilren, the more money we get. On the flip side of this, the longer we keep the children, the more likely teachers are to go berserk and hurt themselves or someone else.

Speaking of hurting oneself, I had a former student attempt suicide. The finer details of his attempt are not important, and when I went to visit him in the hospital, he seemed alert enough. It was a weird thing, driving to the hospital to see a student. Old people, not children, are supposed to be in hospitals. It was inevitable, I suppose, that one of my students would eventually end up attempting suicide, but the thought never really crossed my mind until now--until it happened. I'm going back to visit on Thursday.

The latest, up to date moment in Anime Club: Some people have really piercing voices.

Valete,
Magistra

Who knew?

2011-04-07T12:34:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

My students are doing research papers for or against a controversial topic of my choosing. The topics available to them are:
-Abortion
-Euthanasia
-Video games causing violence
-Death penalty
-War on Terror
-Health care reform

In the course of his research, one student solved the problem of why so many people are getting pregnant, and also discovered the key reason why abortion should be illegal for people who are irresponsible. He wrote the following:

"Abortion is the cause of a huge amount of fetuses."

What a strange world we live in.

Salvete,
Magistra

Let's Make it a Hat Trick.

2011-04-01T08:22:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

Today was a big day as far as blog-worthy items. I cannot help myself.

When a student fails, a few things have to happen.

First, the student has to be determined to fail. This may look like: not paying attention, not turning in notes, overconfidence, etc. If you ever failed a high school class, do us all a favor and stop blaming anyone but yourself. Do not talk to me about how you are the exception to the rule, the teacher was too hard/too mean/hated you.

Second, the student has to maintain his determination to fail for a while. One day of determination to fail is not enough to glean a failing grade. This is not college where you only get graded on two things the whole semester. This nine-weeks alone, my students had 31 assignments. I also take late work, albeit withe a penalty, until the day grades are due.

Third, the teacher has to notify the parent. This is not a part of the actual failure process, but it does have to happen in order for the teacher to submit a failing grade. This is the most unpleasant part of the process, in my opinion, and the part on which I will focus for the rest of this post.

When calling parents, I never know what I am going have answering the phone. It may not speak English, it may be driving or at work, it may be the student himself, or it may be four years old. Regardless of who answers, the next 3 to 30 minutes of my life are guaranteed to be unpleasant. No one likes to hear that their kid is failing. To a (reasonable) parent, a child is the symbol of the best one has to offer the world. If the child fails, the parent feels that failure as well, and perhaps more acutely than does the child. Years of money, time, patience, and heartache go into the child (so do joy and pride and stuff, but those are not as poignant).

When I call a parent, if I am not having to speak in broken Spanish, I try just to listen and allow them to vent. Then I go into the issues I have with the child.

OK, this is boring even me. Let's get to the anecdote.

Today was the day when I call parents. I only had four to call, which is pretty good. That's a 6% failure rate.

The last parent (TLP) I called was very frustrated with me. TLP said the following things to me. I have included my mental and actual responses:

1) I know [student] is very smart but very lazy.
MENTAL RESPONSE: Yes.
ACTUAL RESPONSE: Yes.

2) How should I know to check if [student] is failing when the teacher never calls me?
M. RESPONSE: Because you know #1 in this list.
A. RESPONSE: Are you able to access the online gradebook? No? Oh. Did you get the two progress reports I sent home with [student]?

3) The rest of [student]'s teachers called me, but I did not know he was failing in your class.
M. RESPONSE: Good for them. If he was failing all their classes, it's like DUH that he was failing my class.
A. RESPONSE: I know that must be frustrating.

4) Can [student] come in this afternoon to do extra credit and bring up the grade?
M. RESPONSE: Do you really think I am going to be here after lunch? Do you really think I am going to let [student] made up a semester's worth of work in one afternoon? There is no afternoon long enough.
A. RESPONSE: No. (etc...See post including my Extra Credit philosophy)

5) It doesn't seem fair for you to just be calling now and not let [student] do extra credit.
M. RESPONSE: I would like to point you in the direction of my blog. Reference link in #4.
A. RESPONSE: It would not be fair for me to allow [student] to do extra credit now, when the rest of the students have taken care of their business. I gave an extra credit opportunity, due today, that [student] chose not to do, and that was up to [student].

It went on like this for a while, with TLP variously venting here and there.

Should I ever bear a child into this cold, cruel, unfair world where teachers are blamed for student failure, I hope that someone makes me reread my own blog every day before I send the kid to school.

Valete,
Magistra

Pomp and Circumstances.

2011-04-01T08:12:00.000-07:00

Salvete!

If you read the previous post about today's duty, you might have gotten a little laugh. I thought I would add this post separately because it deals with a different matter than goofy children acting a fool in the hallway. It involves one sweet child affirming the reason I do this job.

Once Joe had moved along, I switched sides of the hall, as I usually do, to assist with the flow of traffic. One of my former students walked by holding a sheet that looked like a withdrawal form. I called her back to me with concern, as she had been an at risk child, a Repeater when she had me for class last year. I asked her if that was a withdrawal form, and with the biggest smile I have ever seen on her face, she told me that, no, it was not. It was a form to show that she was graduating. She was positively ecstatic as I told her how proud I was of her and shared in her joy. She gave me a big hug, not something I am used to getting from students (Rule #3: Keep all physical items to yourself). I hugged her back, so glad to have been part of her life.

It has not been an easy road for her, and seeing the expression on her face was enough to remind me again, as I am reminded almost every day, what I come to this building to do. These kids are becoming whom they are going to be. I hope that I play a positive part in that. I hope that I never collectively contribute to a student giving up, or to a child losing hope. I hope I can teach them that yes, life is hard, and yes, you are going to have to work. Sometimes things will seem unfair. Sometimes it will seem like all of life is working against you. But, I want them to learn that if you work hard, you will probably succeed. Success is never a guarantee, but with hard work, it is a leaps and bounds more likely than if you do nothing.

Salvete,
Magistra

Exams are for the Weak.

2011-04-01T08:03:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

I was done with students at 9:00 this morning, due to exams and it being a half day, but I still had to go to duty. The students attended third and fourth only today, so I saw third period first thing this morning.

Out in the hall, before school, Joe was hanging around outside my room talking to some friends. I asked him why he was not at his usual post yesterday (he had deprived me of the daily dose of attitude, for whatever reason). He babbled on about this or that, and I told him I missed bothering him. He just laughed and smiled with those vacant eyes.

Later, as I walked to my duty station, I saw a young lady push a young man, and the young man retaliated by whacking her on the head with a rolled up piece of paper. I told them to be nice to one another, and who should the young man chance to be upon turning around? My favorite duty-time trouble maker, the aforementioned Joe!

He still had about thirty feet to cover in order to beat me to my duty station, so he laughed an insane cackle and ran ahead of me to get there first. Once I got there, he asked how I was doing, and we exchanged pleasantries. I asked him if he got an A on his third period final (I knew he hadn't, because he spent third standing in the hall making bird noises), and he told me that of course he had. I congratulated him and then told him to move along. Again he laughed an insane laugh, and walked on down the hallway with a bounce in his silly step.

Oh, my job.

Remind me why I wanted to leave again?

Salvete,
Magistra

All's Fair...

2011-03-31T12:26:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

Today, I would like you to join me in a meditation on Fairness. What does "fair" mean? What does it mean "be fair"?

Dictionary.com defines "fair" as "free from bias, dishonesty, or injustice." Definition number two works for my purposes as well: "legitimately sought, pursued, done, given, etc; proper under the rules."

I assigned a mid-term review, to be completed at the students' discretion for extra credit. The students were not required to turn it in or complete it, or any combination of those two. The ones who did the review did better on the exam than those who did not do the review. Those who chose not to do it may have done so because of priorities, laziness, or spite. Say they had a Chemistry test the same day as my exam. Everyone knows that Chemistry is harder than English, or at least more useful and important. Perhaps the child has no intrinsic motivation. He certainly should not be blamed for predisposition to laziness. Maybe the child hates his parents, and refuses to study in order to spite them. I will not even go into how that simply proves to the parents that they are right, and damages the child's future. I am sure some wise and witty teenager would confirm that I am simply old fashioned or something, and say that I should be affirming him and telling him how special he is.

Regardless the reasons, the students had a review, and it was extra credit. Before I begin my meditation on fairness (which may actually become more of an anecdote), I should tell my dear readers, should they exist, my policy on extra credit. I believe that extra credit is simply that: extra. I owe the students nothing in the realm of bonus points. You will not ever find a bonus question on a quiz I have written, nor will you find many opportunities for extra credit in my class. If a student asks me for an extra credit assignment, I will not grant that opportunity until I have looked at the gradebook and asked myself the following questions:
1. Has the student turned in all of his regular credit (no zeroes)?
2. Has the student tried hard this year and is still struggling?
3. Is the student a jackass?

If the answers are 1) yes, 2) yes, 3) no, then I will allow the student to do extra credit. Some students complain that I do not give extra credit until I explain this policy to them. Then, after receiving the explanation, they walk thoughtfully away and are quiet for some time.

Now, on to the anecdote.

A young lady walked into my room during fourth period. In her hand she held a review. Lo! It was the afore mentioned review that I had assined as extra credit. As it happens, the review was due the moment before the start of the test during first period. I had asked for the review in that very moment, and received nine. Coincidentally, there was a tenth review, but it was on the young lady who walked into my room during fourth period. That young lady was (gasp) tardy to my class this morning, as she is most mornings, and missed the call for the review. Now here she was, standing before me, asking me to take the review despite the fact that I already took it approximately six hours ago.

After telling her I would not take it (a delicious moment for any teacher), she begged me to be fair and to enter the wee numbers into the gradebook for her immaculately completed-the-night-before review. Again I told her no. I also asked her what she meant by asking me to be fair. I reminded her that it would not be fair at all for me to take it, as the rest of the students who turned theirs in did so this morning at the deadline.

As our conversation went on, she reminded me of her tardy, which she apparently thought would help her case. It did not, but gave me ammunition, as up to that moment I had not remembered she was tardy (since it happens about three times a week, her tardiness has stopped being something I notice and remember). I reminded her that the rest of the students were here on time to turn in their reviews in at the deadline. For me to take her review now would, again, be unfair.

As a last ditch effort to reap what extra credit she could, she bunted with, "But no one is watching!" I then whipped out the plaque I have that says, "Integrity is doing the right thing when no one else is watching." It has come in handy many times for manipulating students, as it did today. With the saddest puppy dog face you have ever seen, she finally gave in and skulked out of my room, probably not realizing she was the poster child for teenagers thinking that them not getting their way is "unfair."

As a teacher, being fair is difficult. I do not always succeed at it, but I do try to when I can. Naturally, I like some students better than others, because in life, no matter what your education classes try to tell you, some people are just generally more likable than others. I try to assign fair assignments that are completable for all students. I try to make small groups that will consist of students who can help one another.

Inevitably, I have to have a "life isn't stinking fair" paragraph. When these kids get out of this building, and go into the real world, they will and do find that life is indeed unfair sometimes. People will cheat you, you will cheat people. People let you down, etc. As an educator and a pseudo-parent to these children, it is my duty to be as fair as I possibly can. In my mind, "fair" means "stable." It means "dependable." The rules are always the same, and they are the same for everyone. We could all use a little bit more of that in our lives, I think. So many of my kids have really horrible home lives, and if I can provide that stability for them, then good for me (and them). They may not like it sometimes that they cannot do whatever they please, but they will be better for it in the end. At least, I hope so.

Dum spiro spero, mei amici.

Valete, Magistra

Doodie.

2011-03-23T15:14:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

Every day, after third period, I have to stand in the hall for 10 minutes and do "duty" (laugh, go ahead). The hall in question is a cross-roads. It intersects the bottom of a set of stairs, two major hallways, a bathroom, and is 20 feet from the cafeteria. My only job here is to make sure the children keep walking. That is it. That is all I have to do.

For your convenience, I have provided a diagram. While the whole duty thing may sound easy, and easy it can be, there are children who do not want to make it easy.

Take Joe for example (code name in effect). Every day, Joe stands at the same spot. He is the red dot on the diagram above. And every day, I walk out there during passing period, and politely ask him to move. I say, "Sir, I need you to continue walking, please." I say it with a smile. I say it with sweetness. I should be the Sugar Plum Fairy. Where is my freaking tutu?

Usually, Joe rolls his eyes, stands there just long enough to make it look like he is not moving because I asked him to but of his own free will, then goes on his way. Today, however, was special.

I put on my usual sugary sweetness, and for the first time, he retaliates! He says confrontationally, "Don't you have anything to do besides bother me? Gah! Get a new hobby!" I say, "Sir, I'm only doing my job. I ask the same thing of everyone." This is where I wanted to tell him he is not special, but I held it in. I am a professional, after all. He continued in the same veine for about a minute, going on about my "hobby" of harassing him in particular.

But you know what? At the end of his harangue, he moved on, like he does every day. Perhaps he thinks I will not bother him tomorrow, since he verbally abused me today. Actually, his "rapier wit" makes me want to go out there even sooner. I am motivated to go to duty! It is a miracle, and I have Joe to thank. I should make him a card. You know what it would say?

It would say, "Thank you. See you tomorrow."

Valete,

Magistra

S! F! D! B!

2011-03-09T09:09:00.000-08:00

Salvete,

A student got up and went outside to blow his nose. Though this student is usually flippant and somewhat offensive, he was actually very polite and wore nice clothes today.

Anyway, he finished his nose-blowing and came back in. He shoots, he misses! He said, "S!" Another student went, "F!" They said the letters. As if I would not know what they were abbreviating. They do think I am dumb, since I am an adult and have had life experiences, so why wouldn't they abbreviate?

I said, "Please do not use such harsh letters." They did not get it. I am not kidding.

Valete,
Magistra

?

2011-03-09T08:21:00.000-08:00

Salvete.

Same kid as the backpack locker infuriation post.

I give the kids a worksheet as a tool to help them with a debate on Friday.

He asks, "Do we have to fill this out?"

Really?

REALLY?

Ok.

_____

I wrote the above post in a flourish of disgust and anger. However, upon further reflection, I feel that the episode as described is insufficient. It looks like the kind of thing any high schooler would say. I like this kid, in a way. The way is: He is good at academics. The way I get frustrated with this kid is he gives me attitude about everything I say. He was butting into a conversation I was having with another student, and I asked him to please mind his own business. He goes off and makes a huge deal about, "OK IF THAT'S HOW YOU WANT TO BE!" In fact, it was not how I wanted to be. I wanted to tell him to take his arrogance out of my classroom until he could act his age, but I did not. Because I am an adult. I AM AN ADULT.

The thing is, when you think you are an adult, you think you can say whatever you want. However, when you are an adult, you cannot just go around spouting whatever you want. We call people who do that "unlikable" or "rude" or "idiots." We call children who do that "unparented" or "in need of better teachers." Do you see the issue here? When adults do those behaviors, it is on the adults. When children do those behaviors, it is on the adults. Therefore, these children who have never been held accountable for their I-think-I-am-an-adult attitudes become adults. Then, they are mystified when they lose their job.

Now the blog post feels sufficient.

Valete,
Magistra

It's Like A Chicken...

2011-03-09T07:15:00.000-08:00

Salvete,

One of my kids just started making chicken noises. Ah, the dream job!

So, I only have six students right now, due to two absences, two in ISS, one at a tennis tournament, and two in TELPAS. I think it really may be the dream job. I did not get into graduate school, so it is time once again to start accentuating the positive. I only "work" 187 days a year. On top of that I have eight days I can take off at will. I get to make a difference (every teacher has to tell herself this). I get to make a difference. I have to make a difference or why am I here?

Anyway, the kids have been good. None of them have gotten beaten up in the last two weeks, and though some of them just informed me they have never heard of the "Oregon Trail" computer game, they are being generally likable. I know that them being likable is not really interesting or blogworthy, but I thought I would report it anyway (since we are accentuating the positive, after all). I was not assigned an Advisory class (20 minute TAKS instruction class on Tuesday/Wednesday/Thursday), so I get an extra break after second period to breathe. Things at work really could not be better, unless second period had a vocalchordectomy.

Today is the first day of Lent. What better time than to reflect on the joy of my job? In a season of self examination and self sacrifice, I would say there is real happiness in being a teacher. At this moment, writing this blog, I really believe that.

Salvete,
Magistra

Go with the Fluo[rine] (or, What Happens When You Assign An Asinine Project)

2011-03-04T12:29:00.000-08:00

Salvete,

During my conference period, as I come around the corner and start to unlock my room, I hear, "Are you Mrs. ----?"

This could mean one of several things:
1) The Anime Children have recruited another Anime Child.
2) I am in trouble (unlikely).
3) I am getting interviewed for the paper or yearbook.
4) I have something someone wants.

In this case, the answer was behind door number four. The students asked, "Can we use your classroom to make a science video?"

This is not something you expect to hear in my hallway. The closest science room is, well, not very close. So, like the pro I am, I make a face expressing my confusion but let them in anyway. It is not like I have kids right now, and clearly, since I am blogging, I do not have a whole lot else on my plate at the moment.

They proceed to get on a computer, and door number four is opened again. They need speakers, so I provide. I ask what their project is over, and they answer, Platinum, and once the speakers are hooked up proceed to play an odd version of "Poker Face" by Lady Gaga. It might be as bad as the Glee version, though I am not sure anything is that awful.

Ladies and Gentlemen, the hit you have been waiting for: Platinum Rap by Things 1&2, feat. Mutant Poker Face.

To close, because I could not resist some periodic table joke...

Q: Why did Chuck Norris destroy the periodic table?
A: Because he only recognizes the element of surprise.

Valete,
Magistra

No.

2011-03-04T08:07:00.000-08:00

Salvete.

This was written in frustration.

"No" is not a word students like to hear. Heck, adults do not like to hear it either. Let's be honest with ourselves. When someone tells us no, it makes us feel like less of a human since our choice is being taken from us.

"Can I go to my locker?" the student asks. I at least have the (feigned) courtesy to ask why. He says, "Because I have stuff in my bag that I don't need."

Now, you would think that perhaps I might say yes. Such a request to relieve oneself of unneeded school supplies is not unreasonable. If it had been during passing period I would have said yes. If he had not already asked to go somewhere and received an answer to the negative, I would have said yes. If he didn't treat me like a jerk every day for the last four months, I would have said yes.

And yet, when I said no, he acted as though I were imposing some sort of unreasonable restriction on him. What a horror, not to be able to go to your locker at will! What an inconvenience. Heaven forbid he be inconvenienced. (Added later) I just asked him, "Please pick your head up." He moved it so that it was still down but he could see. I said again, "Please pick your head up." He made the tongue-click-I'm-so-inconvenienced-by-your-request noise. ARG! (End of late addition).

Don't get me wrong. I like this kid. He is a great student, very intelligent. We had a good rapport at the start of the year. What happened? Who can say? My first inclination is to blame myself, but I choose not to do so. I have treated him with nothing but courtesy, and if he wishes to hold some sort of odd grudge for no apparent reason, who am I to deny him that? I dare not withhold the rights to which a sixteen-year-old is entitled. I dare not inconvenience the poor boy.

Valete,
Magistra

Anime Club Shirts!

2011-03-02T11:49:00.001-08:00

Salvete!!!!!!!!!

I'm so excited about our shirts for Anime Club. here is the design!

Front:

Back:

Awesome, I know! They are $12 if you want one. Just send me an email or something! Sales run through March 11th!

Valete,

Magistra

OK ONE MORE TODAY THEN I'LL STOP

2011-02-23T14:23:00.000-08:00

Salvete,

Anime Club is being cute and successful today!

They put two dudes at the front of the room and forced everyone to draw a picture of them. Because this is Anime Club and we are being organized now.

At first, I thought this was a bad idea to make everyone participate. It felt like a class, in that the officers made sure everyone was working and turned in a paper to the front. I felt constricted!

Then, they turned on the document camera and went through the drawings. I thought they would all be sort of lame and the same. Same Lame! But they were definitely not.

The two dudes became dinosaurs, sea-monster dinner, weird doom elevator fodder, and all kinds of talented things. I was hoping they would do another one but now they have moved on in their distracted way to some other discussion!

Valete,
Magistra

Now For Some Frivolity!

2011-02-23T13:29:00.000-08:00

Salvete,

Yesterday, my kids were cute.

One of my former students stopped in during third period to say hi. He is a cheerleader, a junior, and a good-looking young man. He comes by almost every day, sometimes twice or three times. Anyway, my student left after bidding me hello, and I saw one girl lean to another and mouth, "He is so cute!"

No one else saw this exchange, and as they were supposed to be paying attention, I mildly chastised them (honestly, I couldn't help but laugh as I did so), and they dissolved into giggle fits. No one else in the class had heard what they said, so they were somewhat confused by our laughter. I got them back on track and the rest of class was uneventful.

My former student came back in after I had sent the class on their way to my teaching partner's room.

I told him what had happened (though I did save the girls' dignity by not telling him which they were). He decided to drop in on my teaching partner to say hi. When he popped out and then popped in again, he reported that upon his entrance some girls had once again dissolved in fits of giggles, and he got a big kick out of being admired. Silly children!

That story sounded better when I told it out loud before.

Valete,
Magistra

You Are Not Special.

2011-02-23T13:04:00.000-08:00

Salvete,

I was listening to a sermon the other day, and it was about how we are not special. I liked it.

I have been saying this for years, and no one seems to believe me except other people who work with teenagers. And then, even some of them do not believe me, for reasons which seem extremely pendulumerific, and which I will not elaborate upon in this post, as it promises to be long enough without such annoyances.

How can I, who believes in the Divine touch in man, say that we are not special?

Because, thankfully, we are all kind of the same. Anyone who argues that one is not alone in the world simply cannot believe that people are special. Being special would not allow for a common human experience--the very thing on which the great works of my content area are based. What greater comfort is there than to know that, despite pain or grief or joy or whatever, that one is not alone? that one inevitably shares their state with someone else? that somewhere, someone in the world has endured the same thing and has survived? Not only survived, even, because surivival is not enough. No, they have gone beyond survival into triumph!

I want my students to see this.

I want them to see that they are not special. To be special is to be isolated. To be special is to be alone. Now, one might argue that being alone is good, or that being isolated can lead to excellent thoughts. Just look at Henry David Thoreau. He chose to leave the World and allow himself to grow through his isolation with nature. He produced some of the most studied Transcendentalist literature of anyone else (I am sure there is a joke in here somewhere about how people who study Transcendentalist literature are not alone or something, but I just cannot pull it out today).

And yet, he wrote. He gathered followers of his philosophy. He was not alone. If he truly wanted to be isolated (read: special), he would have refrained from sharing his experience. However, he did what all good thinkers do, and knew what all good thinkers know: that to remove relatability is to remove being human. He may never have expressly said such a thing, but why else share the revelations of isolation? What is the meaning of isolation if it is not shared?

I feel like I am digressing. Shall I now tangentially mention the merits of prewriting and drafting? No.

Anyway, this particular post, besides stemming from the aforementioned sermon, is also inspired by my co-worker across the hall. Her kids this semester (and in the past as well, though to a lesser degree) are hellians. They have this sense of entitlement built into their brains that baffles me. I always have to be careful when criticizing the next generation, as they may not be any worse than my own, but really, they seem worse. I would never have talked back to, cussed in front of, or refused to do work for a teacher. However, it is possible that in my WASPy-AP Class bubble, I missed out on the essence of being a teenager (if that essence includes being a huge jerk to everyone but myself).

Maybe if the students could understand that the rules apply to them--that they are not special--then the problems caused by entitled teenagers would subside (though I doubt they could be totally eradicated).

The next post (which I am about to write) will be much more frivolous, I promise.

Valete,
Magistra

LIE: First is the Worst, Second is the Best

2011-02-18T11:23:00.000-08:00

Salvete,

I am here to debunk the lie that first is the worst, second is the best.

First is actually really good. They cooperate, and are quiet. Sure, they are usually half asleep and it is pulling teeth to get them to read, but they get the job done.

Second is not the best.

Second tries me. They have been a challenge all year, as you will see if you read over previous blog posts. Second cannot be quiet. They cannot leave one another alone. They cannot refrain from singing under their breath. I still love them, though. Don't get me wrong.

However, the occasional funny thing happens in the second part of second period. Within second period, First really is the Worst, and Second is indeed the Best. I guess the phrase is not all lie. [Since I wrote this post, we have swapped the kids so that the lie now holds. The world makes sense again.]

(If at some point in all this blogging you missed that my 1.5 hour periods are cut into 45minute periods and the class is halved and I share the kids with my teaching partner, well, it is too complicated to get into here. My partner and I switch kids halfway through the 1.5 hour period, and that is all you need to know.)

Today, one of my students was reading the part of Cassius in Julius Caesar. Halfway through a line, his voice trailed off in the promise of a large glob of something being coughed up. He had the nastiest throat-clear I have ever heard in my life. And, I teach high school, so you know I have heard some nasty throat-clears. The whole class recoiled at the intensity of whatever it was trying to get out of the student's throat. I gagged, noticeably, and tried not to throw up. The kids saw, of course, and laughter proceded for the next 3 minutes. The student himself found the whole event quite entertaining, as I'm sure you can imagine.

The next episode I have to share is not so much funny as flattering/odd.

I sat at my desk as students came in the room during the switch between Special Program and my class. I do not usually feel compelled to get up during this switch, since it is not technically passing period. Anyway, the students came in, and while we waited on the lolly-gaggers, one girl said, "Miss, I don't know how you sit cross-legged on that stool. I went home and tried it, and I can't get it without falling off." For your mental-imaging pleasure: I sit on my stool Indian-style, or with my knees pulled up to my chest (arms wrapped around my shins with heels perched on the front edge of the stool). The stool has no back and a seat no more than 1 foot in diameter, so sitting as mentioned can appear/be precarious. I must admit that I have wondered if any of them marvel at how I can stay balanced on a small stool while thus sitting. Apparently some of them do, and more than one, because another girl said, "I know! How do you sit like that? I wonder every time you sit that way!"

Anyway, we have a long weekend with Monday being President's Day, so I am in good spirits!

Valete,
Magistra

Miss, You Look Exhausted.

2011-02-17T06:50:00.000-08:00

Salvete,

I am exhausted, oh observant-student-who-made-the-title-of-this-post.

I was up here last night until 8PM. When I posted yesterday, I still had two and a half hours to go! WHY?

Today, I had a student come in with his tattoo uncovered. I ask him to cover it every day that he has his long sleeves pushed up. He has never come in here with it showing that I have not asked him to cover it. It's the rules, it's dress code, and there are no two ways about it.

So today, apparently he thought the world had changed and the Code of Conduct had been revised for his benefit. Thankfully, he's a good kid (good=mostly cooperative), and didn't give me any trouble. He left the room, presumably to go attempt to cover the tattoo. When he came back, it was still uncovered, and he sent himself to ISS. I didn't even have to do anything. It was sort of surreal.

Hopefully he showed up to ISS, so that when I call to check on him, there isn't trouble.

What else will this day bring? I may leave early.

Valete,
Magistra

I Convinced Someone I Was A 21 Year Old Dentist From Dallas

2011-02-16T15:16:00.001-08:00

Salvete,

When you are the Anime Club sponsor, you hear things like the title above.

You also get a headache.

Today has been and will continue to be one of those days that makes me tired. Here is my day.

7:38AM: OH CRAP THERE IS A FACULTY MEETING THIS MORNING? There goes my morning planning time. Thanks for sending the reminder email at 6:40 last night.

8:17AM: I have to teach Julius Caesar today. Let's skip like 200 lines to keep myself sane!

8:18AM: First period, why are you asleep?

10AM: Second period, why can't you go to sleep and leave me alone?

11:12AM: Oh my gosh, it is 11:12 am and I still have 9 hours to go.

11:19AM: Advisory class, why are you so cute? Also, why do I have to teach you how to take an asinine test that you all are going to pass just fine? I say to them, "Let's have a good attitude and make the most of this time!" This is my face ----> :D This is my heart ----> D:

11:39AM: Oh my gosh it is 11:39 am and I still have 8.5 hours to go.

11:50AM Third period, why are you so chatty today? I proceed to yell at third period in a loving way. They proceed to shape up.

12:13PM: OMG IT IS LUNCH AND THERE IS FREE CAKE.

12:45PM: I still have to teach 3rd period Julius Caesar for another hour. Of all his plays, why are Sophomores forced to read this one? Also, why am I forced to teach Shakespeare and to pretend to like it?

1:58PM: It's time for duty! "WALK AND TALK" with a smile. It works every time to get those hoodlums moving in the hallway.

2:07PM: I approach my room and see one of my former students standing in the hall. He got sent out of his class (which happens to be across the hall from mine). Here's our conversation:
Me: Why are you not in class?
Him: I got sent out. <3 ^^ :) :) :)
Me: Are you giving Mrs. --- trouble?
Him: NO OF COURSE NOT! <3 ^^ :) :) :) (At this point, Mrs. --- leans out her door)
Me: Let me guess. Talking, not in your seat, bugging other students?
Him: *silence* O.o
Mrs. ---: He also decided to use profanity.
I give the student THE HAND and THE HEAD SHAKE and walk away listening to his apologetic protests. I hope Mrs. --- dealt with him appropriately.
*Edit: I was looking over old blog posts, and this is the same child mentioned in the Testes post.*

2:09PM: OMG LESS THAN 1.5 HOURS UNTIL ANIME CLUB WTFLOLSAVEME.

2:30PM: Hey, maybe I can get out of the MEETING THAT I HAVE FROM 6:30-8 tonight. I will go upstairs and see if I can weasel/lie/deceive my way out of having to attend.

2:33PM: I have failed, and now I must attend the meeting. I am a pathetic weasel.

3PM: I will sit in my room and prepare myself mentally for Anime Club. It really is that taxing.

BREAKING NEWS I JUST SAW THE WEIRDEST KID IN ANIME CLUB TOTALLY BLOW OFF THE THIRD WEIRDEST KID IN ANIME CLUB! (The second weirdest kid isn't here today.) WHAT DOES IT MEAN??

3:30PM: The bell rings...and they open the door immediately. Impossible. But true. In they come, with their stench and noise.

3:31PM: OMG ANIME CLUB AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

5:37PM: Here I sit. It is 5:37 PM. Two and a half hours to go. The Anime Club kids are still here. 23 minutes until they leave.

5:43PM: OMG I HAVE ANOTHER MEETING TO ATTEND FROM 6:30 to 8.

Another meeting. Another meeting. Save me...

Valete...
Magistra...

I'm Only Sleeping, Take One.

2011-02-02T05:06:00.000-08:00

Salvete,

It's 7am. I've been awake a while. Title song here.

Naturally, I did not have to be awake. It is a snow day. Perhaps this post might have been better entitled, "Let It Snow," as I feel that might be the holiest of prayers right now. Some people might dislike being cooped up in the house. It is my favorite thing at this moment.

I am, however, pleased with myself for going to the grocery store before Blizzaga IV hit my town.

I could go into the usual rant about how Texans cannot drive in the ice, etc. However, I would not know if they can or cannot, because you will not catch me outside of my house if it is below freezing (generally). I will go to work, I suppose, if forced, but I will do it as quickly as possible, thus making it more difficult for one to catch me being out of doors in sub-30 degree temperatures.

There exists a distinct masochistic pleasure in losing sleep on my days off. On days when I have to get up to go to work, I cannot drag my sorry self out of bed. On days when I do not have to get up until the next day, I find myself awake at the unholy hour of [omitted for its shock factor of earliness]. Now, do not misunderstand me. I enjoy a good sleep-in as much as the next mid-twenties female. The pleasure lies in knowing that I am using the minutes, enjoying the moments, savoring the seconds when I could have been at work. If I am asleep, how can I experience that joy? I would be asleep, people! If awake, regardless of how early, I am soaking up the brilliant fact that I do not have to be up and that I do not have to face the world.

What a lark! What a plunge!

Though I might counter Virginia and her Mrs. Dalloway with the inestimable Bilbo Baggins, when he says, "It's dangerous business, Frodo, going out of your door. You step into the road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to."

At present, I do not care to be swept off, as I find myself happily entangled in my own mind.

Enjoy your day off, should you read this and have one.

And if you did not have a day off, as I know some of you did not, revel in the fact that you have something consistent in your life to cling to no matter what happens. I am not sure that is an entirely comforting thought, but maybe it will help ease the pain of being freaking freezing cold on your way out the door.

Valete,
Magistra

Good Mornin' Beautiful!

2011-01-31T06:29:00.000-08:00

Salvete!

It's Monday.

It's beautiful outside, and has been for the past week. I absolutely love walking out of my door into the temperate air of a Texas midwinter morning. Even if I sleep poorly, or if I am in a mood, breathing in the morning air at the top of the stairs is a shock of energy that prepares me for the day.

This particular morning, I arrived at work feeling especially buoyant. There are many reasons I can think of to be in a good mood, and many reasons also to be sour. I will not go into listing either set of reasons, because whatever reasons exist, I am happy to be here this morning. I had five or six kids in here before school just laughing and having a lovely time. One got her hair cut and colored, two were wary of an invite to an honor society, one would/could not shut his mouth, and one was baffled by my musical performance of my new song-obsession, "If I Die Young" by The Band Perry.

Mornings like this always remind me of Mrs. Dalloway. Everyone remembers the first sentence, going, "Mrs. Dalloway said she would buy the flowers herself." But those are not the lines I remember. The line in my head when I walk out of the door in the mornings is this: "What a lark! What a plunge!" It goes on, "For so it had always seemed to her, when, with a little squeak of the hinges, which she could hear now, she had burst open the French windows and plunged at Bourton into the open air. How fresh, how calm, stiller than this of course, the air was in the early morning; like the flap of a wave; the kiss of a wave, chill and sharp..." I love thinking of every morning's step out the door as a step into the lapping cold of the ocean, a step into the embrace of the past and all of its glory. How can one not be invigorated by such a thought?

What a lark! What a plunge!

Ah, Mrs. Dalloway and your white narrow bed in the attic, your love of parties, your distaste for Septimus tainting the perfect air of your festivity. You are with me this morning in a poignant way which I cannot quite grasp. I am grateful, however, for your companionship. It makes things easier to bear.

More to come later, I assume, as today portends to be very dull, despite my joy.

Valete,
Magistra

Pizza or Paper?

2011-01-26T10:25:00.000-08:00

Salvete!

Today was the Special Program's award ceremony. Any student who passed all of their classes received a certificate, and any student who made straight A's got a certificate and a gift card. We had seven out of 64 make straight A's. I cannot even begin to say how proud I am of my kids. Some of them have worked harder than they (or I) ever thought they could (or would). Not only that, but they got pizza.

It may surprise you, but some were more pleased to get the certificate than the food. Kids these days! Yeesh!

Today I have to give a special shout-out to a friend of mine. I admire her more than I can say. I hope she will not mind me mentioning that her mother is going through some very difficult medical treatment, and it has affected my friend greatly. Nonetheless, my dear friend has persevered (as we all knew she would, of course) and continued to be the strong person she always has been. In the face of so much heartache, the rest of us can only look to her example and yank our problems quickly into their proper place and perspective. Thank you, friend, for being a hero and example in this difficult time of your life.

If you are interested, my friend's blog is kickass. It is here. Prepare to be whimsicalized.

In other news, Anime Club is cancelled today because of what I thought was a mandatory meeting about some changes that are coming to our school district next year. I have found out today that said meeting is not in fact mandatory. Thus, Anime Club will remain cancelled, and I will be scooting myself out of the building with all haste. Nap time, here I come!

Oh, sweet reprieve!

To continue on a victorious note...

An interaction between a student and myself:
Student: Can I go to my locker?
Me: What for?
S: I need to get something for my next class.
M: You can go on your passing period.
S: But we have that award ceremony.
M: You will have plenty of time.
S: But I don't feel like going to my locker on my passing period.
M: Your feelings in this matter are of no interest to me.
S: FINE!

HAHAHAHA! I get to do that because I am the teacher. WORD.

If you have never seen Taylor Mali do his slam poem, "What Teachers Make," I highly recommend looking it up on YouTube. I would link you, but YouTube is Strictly Forbidden at work. The above conversation reminds me of the segment of WTM that goes something like:

"I make kids sit through 40 minutes of study hall
In absolute silence. No, you cannot work in groups.
No, you cannot ask a question, so put your hand down.
Why can't you go to the bathroom? Because you're bored,
And you don't really have to go, do you?!"

That's right, Taylor! They can hold it! I bear witness!

Valete,
Magistra

Accentuate the Positive!

2011-01-21T10:31:00.000-08:00

Salvete,

In reading over my last few blog posts, it occurred to me that I have been far too negative. I do not want anyone thinking that I hate my job. I definitely do not want anyone thinking that I dislike my students. Quite the contrary! I love my job, and I am very blessed to have it. Teaching jobs are hard to come by in our current economic climate, and one as nice as mine is especially rare. As for my students, there is not a single one that I regret currently having in class. There is not a single one that I wish would leave and never come back. They are all so different, so interesting, so angsty! How could one not love their ever-changing moods, their poorly-masked need for approval, and their desire to achieve?

Teenagers have a desire to achieve? Mine do. They are not in this special program because they are slackers. Some of them slack off, yes, but none of them are slackers. Circumstances get in the way of success sometimes. However, in the face of so many people who expect them to fail due to race, ethnicity, behavior records, or socioeconomic situations, my students stand up and refuse to fall into the stereotypes. They want more. I just have to remember that right now, they are so young, and are not yet that which they will become. But they will be. And that is all I need to know.

Valete,
Magistra

Testing

2011-01-20T12:11:00.000-08:00

Salvete,

I'm afraid it is now time to write a post on testing. I have mentioned such as testing before, but the spring always brings with it a fresh reminder of the joys of the standardized test. If you ask any teacher what the spring is about in public high school, one word will (if not at first, eventually) come to mind.

Testing.

How do I hate thee? Let me count the ways!
1) TELPAS
2) LAT
3) TAKS
4) STAAR (new)
5) EOCs
6) AP Tests
7) Benchmarks
8) SAT/ACT/THEA (I group these because they do not affect me directly and can take place anytime of year)
9) Etc.

All of the above occur from March 1 to May 30. The school at which I earn my pay tests approximately 2800 students. Do not let this number fool you into some delusion that the students are neatly divided into classrooms in groups of 25 and tested with pretty sharpened pencils.

The state will not allow it.

No.

NO!

Each test must be administerd to a specific population, and at specific times, in specific windows. Proctoring each test requires sometimes multiple trainings. They make the trainings and proctor certifications requirements, because if they did not, no one would go and no one would be certified to proctor the test.

Below, I have provided for you a run-down of what it takes to coordinate a single test date.

1) The testing coordinator makes a giant spreadsheet, because not every student is taking every test, so for this one test date, she has to figure out who is taking what. This spreadsheet must consist of student names, student ID numbers, teachers, room numbers (but what rooms can we use? Anecdote: last year I was supposed to give the TAKS in a room that, when opened, had four wheelchairs, a teacher desk, and a changing screen), and whether that student is special ed or has any kind of accommodations.

2) The testing coordinator sends an email to everyone and forgets to attach the giant spreadsheet.

3) The testing coordinator gets about 45 emails letting her know she forgot the attachment.

4) The testing coordinator corrects her greivous error.

5) The testing coordinator gets about 53 emails letting her know what was wrong with her spreadsheet.

6) And so on.

7) Every day of the week before testing, the teachers remind the students to check the giant spreadsheet sans ID numbers and special ed info (posted in at least 8 places around the building) to ensure they go to the right room on test day.

8) The students show up on test day, vaguely aware that there is something important going on.

9) The students show up to their normal first period, and are turned away by the proctor, a stranger, who tells them to go look at one of the aforementioned 8 occurances of giant spreadsheets which have mysteriously appeared in the last week, and which the children claim never to have heard of before.

10) Testing commences.

11) Active Monitoring (AM) commences. Now, you may be asking "Shouldn't you say, "Active monitoring (Am)"? To you doubters of my abilities in understanding the rules of capitalization, I say, "Clearly you have never proctored a test." AM involves the following:
a) Forcing the students to stand outside your door as you check each one of them in.
b) Taking each student's lunch order.
c) Forcing them to part with anything they brought and put it at the front of the room.
d) Taking away and labeling their cell phones or other electronic devices.
e) Filling out a provided seating chart that does not match the dimensions of the room.
f) Taking attendance 3 times (not a hyperbole).
g) Reading the test directions and helping people understand how to write their names.
h) Admitting late students, who also require all of the above procedures.
i) Walking around the room for a period of four to five hours. You may not sit.
j) Escorting students to the bathroom like they are five years old.
k) Recording who and what time they went to the bathroom.
l) Blah blah blah.
m) Collecting all test materials and delivering them back to the office.
n) Delivering any students who are (impossibly) not finished with the test to another place.
Letters "a" through "h" must be done to 25 students in approximately 10 minutes.

12) Class (usually lunch and third period) commences. The children are drained and prone to misbehavior.

13) A movie is started in every classroom on campus, and the children form theories about why they have to come to school a full day if all we do is watch a movie after TAKS. The teachers also wonder this, and may or may not express their wonderment.

I guess that's it.

Don't you want to be a teacher?

Valete.
Magistra

Anime Idol Again.

2011-01-19T14:29:00.000-08:00

Salvete.

It's that time of year again. Time. For. Anime. Idol.

If you missed last year's Anime Idol, here is the link to the blog post:
http://magistrasapiens.blogspot.com/2010/03/forget-american-idol.html

We have our Randy, our Paula, and our Simon, who are played by the same three girls as last year.

We have our Ryan Seacrest, played by the same student as last year, wielding his Coke-bottle microphone.

And we have our various acts.

What you've all been waiting for:
1) Youtube Rap (inappropriate content)
2) Medly of Rick Astley and Pokemon
3) Pokemon Theme Song (the child started out singing really horribly, then another child dragged it off the stage, and into the hall...a fake-mustacio'd child, looking remarkably like the dragged child, appeared to finish the song in a dramatic Spanish accent)
4) Awake and Alive by Skillet (Dramatic)
5) Card Captor Somethinginjapanese Theme Song
6) If You Were Gay (?)
7) Soldier Side by System of a Down (Dramatic)
8) Last-Minute-Give-Me-A-Request-I-Want-The-Prize Song (Which turned into "What Hurts Most" as done by Cascada)
9) L-O-V-E by Nat Cole King [sic]
10) Something I can't identify...it might have been rap?
11) Dirty Pop by N'Sync

AND THE WINNER IS.

#8.

Lesson: Preparation is no good. If you just throw something together at the last minute because the prize is cool, you're sure to get what you want.

And so you see. This has everything to do with Anime. Or something.

At least he kids have fun, which I guess is really all that matters.

Valete.

Magistra

When Will I See You Again?

2010-12-01T14:52:00.001-08:00

Salvete,

I'm back.

It has been quite a while, with several misadventures. Students have left the special program of which I am a part, and I am sure several more will be gone after the semester. However, others are chosing to stay. They want help getting to college, and have embraced the teachings of the instructors who care for them. It has been exciting to watch them grow, and heartbreaking when their home lives challenge them and they suffer. We had several incidents occur over the last few weeks, and although they will pass, the students are still hurting now (and we know that now is what is most important to them, the only moment in time that they know or acknowledge).

Additionally, today is the first Anime Club meeting in three weeks! The students have playfully given me a hard time for being absent, though they take care of themselves when I am not around by going to park and playing Red Rover, etc. I will not lie, the break from their emotions and craziness has been nice, but I found myself missing it nonetheless. The ennui was dispelled almost immediately, though, upon the reconvening of the masses. At least they are watching a movie today (Origins), so they are subdued. Hopefully the movie is long enough to carry over into the next meeting.

Anime Club will not be meeting next week, but what joy I feel at that prospect is immediately laid aside due to an overwelming dread for where I am going to be in order to miss the meeting. Once a month over the last three months (December included), I have been subjected to what is called SIOP Training. These trainings are the pinacle of why I hate educational theory. The leader talks to us like we are five and she is seven, I am surrounded by goody-goody elementary teachers, and I am forced to film myself teaching for a project. My intense dislike is exacerbated by my least favorite co-worker being there. I had to sit next to the person at the last meeting, and the person was tolerable, though certainly not lovable. We are grouped for next week for the showing of the videos, and hopefully will not have to be in a room together again after that. Ever.

SIOP Training was the proverbial straw, and I the camel. I had been contemplating for some time going back to school to get my PhD in English. I thought I could stand being a teacher forever, but that is just not the case. I thought after my first year that the useless seminars would get better. Then, I switched districts, and I told myself that all the useless seminars had to do with me being new to the district. Now, it is my second year here, my third year teaching, and still I suffer. I feel like making tallies on the wall, a la prison. My co-teacher is 35 years old, has been teaching for more than ten years, and he is undergoing the same SIOP training as I am. I was in the copy room the other day, and a teacher randomly asked me, "Do you think you could do this for thirty years? This is my thirtieth year." I slowly backed away in horror at the prospect of myself as a rotund, 55-year old teacher who had become disenchanted years before but could not escape because of retirement considerations. That same week, the very same week that I had decided difinitively to start applying, another teacher told me, "Get out of here and get your PhD while you can." Perhaps these incidences were co-incidences only, but they were duly noted and filed away. I have now applied to Duke, UNC, A&M, SMU, UNT, and Tech.

My actions are not to say that I dislike teaching itself. I rather enjoy having a captive audience. I love the kids, but there will always be kids. If I get a PhD, I can teach at a deeper level, and deal with college-age students. I can be a student again while earning the degree, which is what I love doing best of anything. I was meant to be an academic. Yes, I know there will be meetings and trainings when I am a professor. That is not the point. The point is academia. The point is freedom. The point is doing what I need to do. Husband has been infinitely supportive, as have my recommenders. I am so looking forward to Feburary/March/April when I find out who has rejected me. Or, even better, who has accepted me. I hope they accept me.

That's all for now. Still 45 minutes left in Anime Club.

Save me.

Valete,
Magistra

My balogna has a first name...

2010-09-28T10:30:00.000-07:00

Salvete!

The eternal question: is doing your hair more important than homework? Of course it is!

A student walked into my class today with his hair freshly braided. I asked him how much time he had spent doing his hair, since I knew how little time he spent doing his homework. He became immediatley defensive, saying that he couldn't come to school looking like a fool with his hair like that guy's (as he pointed to a responsible boy in the class, including the necessary "no offense"). I told him he looked like an even bigger fool if he didn't have his homework done.

The argument went on for a little bit, and the guy with the bad hair (an amazing afro that I think is pretty cool) stepped in to try to explain some things about responsibility. Eventually, they came back to me, and I told the irresponsible student that I thought he was full of balogna. He took offense, of course, which encouraged me to insult him further. He just makes it too easy.

I have now spent the rest of class pretending that all I could hear come out of his mouth was the phrase, "I'm full of balogna," every time he asks me a question.

Valete,
Magistra

If you try sometimes, yeah you just might find...

2010-09-25T21:38:00.000-07:00

...I got what I need!

A specific child is no longer in my class. This child, who (of course) shall remain nameless, was a hol[ier than thou] terror for six weeks. I wasn't aware that a fifteen-year-old could know everything, including what was best for itself*, but apparently this child does. The child also is fully trained in educational best practices (to a degree far beyond both of mine), and is fit to decide what it will need after the age of 18, a place it has not been but seems to know all about.

And I ask you, why should we read books in English class? Preposterous. Yet, the child seems to have decided that this must be so. I ask you too, why should we take notes in a style confirmed as a best practice by law schools and 30+ years of research? Ridiculous! Let the reform begin!

On a less sarcastic, caustic, and demeaning note, this week may have been a rough one, but it was nothing compared to what it could have been, had this child still been in my class.

That is not to say that I did not love the child. Of course I did. In a way. A small, very difficult-to-see,-detect,-or define way. Am I embittered? Certainly not. Am I relieved? Of course. I could have survived all year with it in my class. I originally typed, "very well could have," but then decided that that was a falsehood. There would have been nothing going on that anyone would have described as "very well."

*I refer to the child as "it" in order to refrain from revealing the gender, not to suggest something about the gender (or the usual lack thereof that comes with the pronoun "it").

Anyway, we took the kids on a field trip this week. They had a wonderful time, and I rode on a school bus, surrounded by germs. The germs germinated, and became a cold or some other contagious plague. At least it was not the flu. *Knock on wood.* I am over it now, since I received the infection on Tuesday. Hopefully this means that my immune system is appropriately fortified against any new strains of whatever, and I won't get sick the rest of the year.

Speaking of sick, I watched "Shutter Island" today. It was recommended by a friend, and was very good. I will now recommend it to you, my non-existent audience.

Valete,
Magistra

Anime Club Commences Again

2010-09-15T15:17:00.000-07:00

Hey there.

Er, Salvete.

I've resigned myself to the fact that I will never be teaching Latin again. I'm too specialized now in my department. I've been trained to teach upper-level classes, as well as trained to pilot a program for kids in the academic middle. I get to use Latin many days, but so much of it has slipped away. I still love it, but I am ready to accept that I am done using my Latin certification for which I worked so hard.

Now, on to less dismal thoughts!

Anime Club has indeed begun again. Expect posts on Wednesdays. Unbelieveably, everything is graded and I can pen a post. There are approximately 40 students in my class right now, half watching "Princess Mononoke," and half doing various other things. There is one student in a gas mask (speaking in a terrible Russian accent), four playing Yugio, and all is well. Just another day at Anime Club.

They have about eight minutes until I kick them out. If you are unfamiliar with the blog, last year I had about 10-15 students weekly. 40 students is a lot, especially considering I only have 15 desks, and am aiming to take that number down to 12. Many bodies are on the floor, which is disgusting, because I am fairly certain that the floor gets cleaned only in the summer. Yay, public school!

But really, my custodian is very nice, and most days we have an awkward conversation in Spanish, often consisting of him laughing at me and calling my teaching partner a gringo. My teaching partner does not speak Spanish at all, and I speak enough to exchange pleasantries. I guess that saves me from gringo status. Not that there's anything wrong with being a gringo, or gringa, for that matter.

It's sushi night, and I am thankful.

Valete (bye),
Magistra (female teacher)

The Way to End the Day

2010-05-24T13:04:00.000-07:00

Salvete.

If it weren't for fourth period, I'd be going home right now. What I do not mean by this is, that without a fourth period, the day would be over, the final bell would have rung, and I would be walking out the door.

Not at all.

What I mean is, without the students in fourth period, I would be so depressed, downtrodden, grouchy, and angry, that I'd be calling in an emergency substitute and leaving straightaway.

Instead, I am still here, and glad to be so. The students in fourth period bring so much light to my day. Perhaps it is their innocence, their naivete. However, third period is naive in its way. Third period is naive in thinking they know what there is to know, in thinking that they are mature, socially aware, and academically adept. Nothing could be further from the truth, on the whole. Fourth period, on the other hand, has an innocent curiosity in what I have to say and what there is to learn. They listen the first time (most times). They don't talk back, and always ask how my day was. They also are always eager to tell me what has happened in their days, and I am no less eager to hear. Of course they have their moments of stupidity, for they are teenagers.

Is it bad to say that, collectively, I love them the most? It may be as bad to do that as it is to choose a favorite offspring. Even if it is in one's heart, one probably shouldn't say it, for fear that it will come back to punish one in some grave way.

No specifics today, just a reflection.

Valete,
Magistra

Testes!

2010-05-07T07:33:00.001-07:00

Salvete!

I was grading papers today ("Never an easy or a pleasant task."), and will be for ages hence. These papers are supposed to be research that compares two colleges. I'm glad I was paying attention, so that I could bring you this gChat conversation between my husband and me:

me: Real sentence from a paper:
me: "It also depends on your scores that you get on your testes
him: tee hee :3
me: , which guarantees you a scholarship. hahahaha
him: lol, oh, they will be so supplized at the way the world works
me: testes lol
me: he's gonna prostitute his way into the school with scores on his testes hahahahahaha

This is probably the blog post that draws most closely to inappropriate.

Valete!
Magistra

Please...make it stop.

2010-04-28T15:09:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

We haven't had Anime Club in a few weeks due to the wedding. I thought I missed it.

I didn't.

The kids have gotten the bright idea to do something besides watch anime. And so. We are having a brainstorming session. (Game-show voice...commence!) What other ideas can we come up with besides watching anime? Let's find out!

1. "Let's do something like Anime Idol except not singing!"
2. "Let's play games!" "That's too general!"
a. Anime Chess
b. Anime Clue
c. Anime Dancing
d. Anime Theater Endeavor
3. Anime picture of the week!
4. Anime's Best Dance Crew
5. Anime's Got Talent
6. Magicians
7. David Hasselhoff
8. Pokemon battle using action figures or cards
9. Summer meetings (kaiboshed immediately)
10. Anime Club Twitter
11. Yahoo Group
12. Anime potluck
13. Art contests (already were doing but stopped happening)

It sort of degenerated into meaninglessness in the middle, but our officers brought it back. Here is how they did it.

1. Singing random snippits of songs (this was often)
2. Rick rolling
3. Kitty dancy thing
4. Chicken dance (current moment)
5. "OY!"
6. Grapevine
7. Reading "Biff, Willy, Linda, Happy" off of the Death of a Salesman poster at the back of the room
8. Weirdo noises which turned out to be big words said really quickly

What joy is mine. One of the students has a staticky verson of "Smooth Criminal" as performed by Alien Ant Farm blasting on her cell phone. They've all congregated at the front of the room to write their names on an Anime Club Contact List. I'm done giving you a play-by-play, because I can't keep up with the chaos. I may have to find something to do outside of the room while they finish the meeting.

At least they bring candy ever week.

Valete,
Magistra.

Hamburgers at Bicyclers

2010-04-01T11:47:00.001-07:00

Salvete...

I just have to remind myself that I'm working with teenagers. Here is a story, told to me by a friend, about an experience with teenagers she had in college. That makes it sound like I was told this recently. She actually told it to me like three days after it happened, and that was about two years ago. Considering the length of time since I heard the story, forgive any inaccuracies.

Anyway, without further ado...

Once upon a time, L was riding her bike to campus. A car, containing two or so teenagers, drove by her. All of a sudden, L was struck by a hamburger. Yes. A hamburger. Ketchup, Mustard, and All.

L, now dirtied with such accoutrements of fast food as are appropriate to being hit with a hamburger by a passing vehicle, filled with rage. However, unable to do anything, continued riding her bike to campus. Behind her, she hears a car. Yes. You guessed it. The same car. Equipped with another hamburger.

Struck again, L filled with rage. The car in question reached the end of the block (a busy intersection) and had to stop sooner than the driver could have hoped. L was able to catch the vehicle, and approached the window. She told the teenager, through the window, that she was going to call the cops. She went to the back of the car, wrote down the license plate, and went on her way.

Those people in the car are the people I work with every day. Here's to you, L.

Valete,
Magistra

Well, to be fair, that's a big leaf.

2010-03-26T18:24:00.000-07:00

Salvete!

Mid-terms are over, thank goodness. A child stayed after school for thirty minutes to finish twenty questions. The test was challenging, but it wasn't hard if you studied. Clearly the student didn't study.

So, now that the weekend has started, my reverie has begun. I am gaming, and the following conversation just happened while fighting these little things called Mandragora. See link for onion reference. In game, my character is really tiny, about the same size as the Mandragora (comes up to your mid-thigh, if that). There are five races to choose from, and the race I chose, Tarutaru, is the smallest (and therefore, cutest). Her name is Cumaea, and my love's name is Gouka. The other people are friends from the game.

Cumaea: he's bigger than me
Ryukashin: everything is bigger than you lol
Cumaea: that leaf is bigger than me
Mochalatte: he's an onion
Gouka: well, to be fair, that's a big leaf
Cumaea: i meant the tree leaf
Gouka: i know
Mochalatte: he's a baby tree

There are about three different threads of conversation going on there. I had to laugh when this went down, so I had to put it in here for your enjoyment. I know it just made me about 1000 times geekier in the eyes of the world, but I'm not sure the world reads this blog, so I don't mind.

Valete,
Magistra

9 weeks in.

2010-03-26T07:29:00.000-07:00

Salvete!

That's right! We are nine weeks into the third nine-weeks. So really, it has been eleven weeks since we came back from Christmas break (I see the word eleven, and always think "elvan"). In my district, the last day of midterms or finals is always a half day for the kids, and a late two-hour lunch break for the teachers. The lunch break is usually so late that coming back up to the building is pointless. I'm sure you get the idea.

In addition to the half day, students go to their third period classes first thing in the morning. As you can imagine, high schoolers struggle with this idea. Being like puppies, they get in the routine of going here first, there second. Any change in their routine causes great emotional distress (what doesn't cause great emotional distress for a teenager?). A student who normally has first period in my room walked in this morning. I greeted him without a second thought (teachers get in routines, too). He walked back out, looking confused. He didn't recognize any of the students in the room (my third period students). I realized both of our mistake, and sent him on his way.

Having students first thing in the morning is something of a challenge for me. For some reason, last year, when school started at 7:25, I was able to be chipper. This year, having first period as my conference, I have become a real afternoon person. I warned third period that I would be a different animal come Friday morning when they walked in. I warned them that I am quite grouchy in the morning, and not to cross me, on threat of death (or something). Incredibly, they took me seriously, and have been angels, else they themselves are still asleep, which is a distinct possibility. I really am grouchy, just not as grouchy as I let on I would be.

Thus far in the morning, little else has gone on. Mid-term time is usually quite subdued, as most of the students take them seriously, and understand that I will give them a zero if they should be caught cheating (I totally would).

I'll let you know if anything else goes awry.

As I typed that last statement, a student raised its hand. "My scantron is off by one, and I don't know where I got off," it said. "Well, you have lots of time left in class, so that's a good thing," I replied. So cruel.

Valete,
Magistra

It's almost time to go: I need tape.

2010-03-24T15:16:00.000-07:00

Salvete!

What will happen today in Magistra's classroom? Through the various periods, the children have been up to no good.

A group of three students in third period has decided to see what they can get away with without me noticing. None of their activities are dangerous or ill-intended, but instead are of the gambling nature. How long can I stand behind the tall metal cabinet blowing my nose until Magistra notices? How long can I sit on the floor after the bell before Magistra says something? What happens if I ask Magistra for a hug? At the moment, I find their shenanigans somewhat amusing, but I'm not sure how long I will tolerate them.

The title of the post is the quote of the day. Towards the end of first period, a child approached my desk, and said, "It's almost time to go: I need tape." I just moved on with my day, hoping that the tape would be used for some sort of communal good, intended to occur soon after the student's departure from the classroom.

Fourth period's strangeness is less severe. A student held up a ball made of masking tape. "Miss, look at my tape ball." Clearly, the child has far too much time in art class. I told him it was interesting in such a way that he would know that I was not interested. Naturally, he had to toss it to another student, at which point I had to threaten to confiscate it. I love baby-sitting.

I had made a list of things that happened today. As so often occurs with my note-taking, I wrote down some key words which I later forgot what they meant. The word at the top of the list was "Easter." I'm sure whatever scenario inspired the note was very funny, but it is lost forever.

Valete!
Magistra

Then fall, Caesar.

2010-03-23T14:16:00.000-07:00

Salvete!

Twice in one day? No, it isn't the apocolypse.

What have we learned about the comical situation regarding the sleeping/standing student? That if you torture a student and then they walk out, it makes more work for you.

I already knew this lesson, but review never hurts.

I had no intention of writing up the student, but here is what happened:

The student went to the assistant principal's office, as he said he would. Fabulous. Rather than calling me and requesting a prompt office referral, the office let him sit in there and briefly talk with the assistant principal. After school, the student came back to me. I asked him what happened, and he told me the above. I called the office assistant to verify, to discover that what he told me was true. The assistant asked that I fill out an office referral for the student's act of walking out. I know the referral is the right course of action, but the student is the one who referred himself to the office, so he should have to write the referral. I've made a student fill out his/her own office referral before, but it slipped my mind until I had time to sit down and contemplate on this blog.

Oh well. As I said, review never hurts. I have to go put this in the assistant principal's box now.

Valete,
Magistra

Et tu, Brute?

2010-03-23T13:33:00.000-07:00

Salvete!

We're reading Julius Caesar at the moment. If you don't know, Caesar was a real person, but Shakespeare also knows how to take the artistic license, so to speak. Sure, it isn't the most interesting play that the Texas State Board of Educators could have chosen, but it isn't the worst. We could be reading the Henry plays, the which I was supposed to read in college. I, of course, did not read them, but took my chances. I would never encourage my students to do such a thing, though sometimes such a thing is the best thing to do.

Friends, Romans, countrymen! Lend me your ears!

To my right, on the opposite side of the room, a student is standing up. Why? Because he sleeps every day, and I've had quite enough of that. The student's chief complaint in having to stand up is that he fears all the blood will rush to his legs. Perhaps the statement was made in jest, perhaps not. It is hard to tell with this one. Anyway, he's having to stand for about thirty minutes, which is certainly in his best interest, per my observations. What have we learned from this? Don't sleep, or Magistra will make you stand up far from any apparatus on which to lean.

HAHAHA! He just walked out, opting to go to the office rather than stand up and pay attention. Do you know what I said? I said, "See you tomorrow!"

Valete,
Magistra

Forget American Idol...

2010-03-03T14:58:00.000-08:00

...try Anime Idol!

Salve!

I can't remember what I wrote last. However, I'm not sure I keep this updated enough for it to matter. I'm in the second semester at my new job. I became the Anime Club sponsor some time ago (Septemberish), and have been having an interesting time, to say the least.

Today is Anime Idol. This show has been in the works for some weeks. It involes three of our female members (acting as Randy, Paula, and Simon) judging several others of our members singing non-Anime related songs. The songs performed are:
1. "The Campfire Song" from Spongebob Squarepants
2. "Won't Give Up" by Hillary Duff
3. "What I've Done" by Linkin Park
4. "Without You" from Spongebob Squarepants
5. "I Have A Dream" from Mamma Mia!
6. "Let the Little Lady Talk" by Capital Lights

We even have a Ryan Seacrest, using a coke bottle as a mic. I know, right? In the audience, we have approximately ten adolescents waving their arms or headbanging, as appropriate. Believe me, we are getting this all on video, and the public will not be denied what it wants: the much anticpated CD/DVD special edition "First Annual Anime Idol" music and video.

The show just took an interesting turn. The girls as their "Judge Selves" are doing their rendition of Beyonce's "Put a Ring on It" dance. What will happen next in the thrill that is Anime Idol!?!?

But on a more serious note, I have really enjoyed being the Anime Club sponsor. I was hesitant at first, not wanting to take on too much, but the kids really run themselves. If you will, imagine the kind of kid that comes to Anime Club. I won't go into specifics. They are so supportive of one another, no matter what nerdiness comes out of each meeting.

And the winner is...
"Second place, in this contest, is [Mama Mia!]! And, first place, in this Anime Idol (like there are any other ones) is...[Hillary Duff]!"

Now, a rousing chorus of "We are the Champions" by Queen.

Vale,
Magistra

I'm a blog neglector (neglecter?)

2009-11-30T17:38:00.000-08:00

Salvete,

I haven't written a blog post in nearly five months! Maybe more...I do not feel like checking. So much has happened in the last five months that I feel I can barely recount it all! Since that is the case, please excuse me for not recounting it all, as I remember none of it in great detail, and all of it will probably bore you.

The wedding website is thoroughly updated, the URL of which you can ask for personally, and I may or may not give it to you.

My new job is fantastic. I'm already in line for a promotion.

I'll try to post stuff on here as it happens with the wedding. Last year, this was a "New Teacher" blog. Now I will attempt to make it a "Wedding" blog.

Valete,
Magistra

Fishin' and Gonna be Hitchin'!

2009-06-22T20:26:00.000-07:00

Salvete!

There were pictures in this post, but they have been removed to protect the anonymity of this blog.

It has been so eventful around here! Yesterday, I went to my love's aunt and uncle's house for a father's day lunch and get-together. I got to meet two more members of my love's wonderful family. They are so lively and warm! I can't wait to be one of them (I feel like I already am!). We all went fishing, and the only person who caught anything was my love's grandpa Bebo. I am looking very cool in my love's sunglasses!

[Former Picture]

This is the part of the day where I beat my love at pool. I only won because he scratched on the eight ball. I was doing OK though, before that!

[Former Picture]

Today, my love and I went to Pisgah National Forest. We stopped at Looking Glass Falls for some photo ops. He did very well on this picture of me with the falls. It was much higher than it looks in the picture!

[Former Picture]

At one of the overlooks we stopped at, there were bumblebees! I had to take some pictures, and this one turned out the best of them all.

[Former Picture]

The day was a little hazy, but you can still see the splendor of where we were. This overlook was about 4700 feet above sea level. The mountains aren't called the Blue Ridge Mountains and Smokey Mountains for no reason!

[Former Picture]

I loved going through the tunnels...I tried to be artsy but I'm not sure if I achieved my goal!

[Former Picture]

And yes, this is where it all happened. We drove for about an hour and a half through winding mountain roads in order to get to Mt. Mitchell, the highest peak east of the Mississippi River. Please note my stylish shawl (actually a black bedsheet). It was only 65 degrees up there, and very windy! You can see how foggy it is. Let me tell you something...that isn't fog! Those are clouds! We were so high that we were actually up in the clouds, at almost 6,700 feet!

[Former Picture]

Behind me there is a 360 degree overlook that on clear days I'm sure gives a spectacular view of the surrounding mountains. Near us was Cold Mountain, the peak after which the novel and movie (starring Nicole Kidman and Jude Law) are named. I know, you're saying, "Get to the good stuff already!" Well! Here it is! My love and I walked up the rest of the way to the overlook, and after I shouted to the four cardinal directions, "Hello [insert appropriate state name here]!" my love took me in his arms and told me he loved me. He then very sneakily took something out of his pocket, and proceded to tell me how he wanted to marry me and be my husband. He got down on one knee and asked me to marry him! I said, "Of course!" That sealed the deal! He put that gorgeous ring on my finger, and we were officially engaged to be married!

[Former Picture]

Here we are at the top! I loved getting engaged in the clouds! Not only was I on Cloud 9 anyway, but I got to be in the actual meteorological clouds too! We had the whole platform to ourself for about ten minutes, and then some nice people came up to the top with their family and took our picture!

[Former Picture]

Ladies, here's what you've been waiting for...a picture of my ring! It is so shiny! This picture does not do it justice! Check Facebook for more photos!

Valete!

Magistra

Big Glassy and Poet of "Chicago"

2009-06-20T07:04:00.000-07:00

Salvete!

[Former Picture] Can you believe it? My love's dad drives a MiniCooperS! I haven't gotten to drive it yet, but I've been on my best behavior, so we'll see how that goes.

[Former Picture] Yesterday, we took a trip away from the fairy cottage to the 22-year home of Carl Sandburg. For those of you who are illiterate or otherwise uninformed, Carl Sandburg is a one of the great American poets, considered canonical, and is in all of my college English textbooks. He wrote the widely recognized poem, "Chicago," and is the author of an extensive biography on Abraham Lincoln. The grounds of his home were beautiful. Below, you can see some of the sights. He had three scarecrows in his garden, two live, and one not (see below for a photo of this phenomenon).

[Former Picture] Sandburg's wife kept goats, and while we were at the Sandburg home, we learned that his wife held the record for highest milk production for ages, and was well known in goat circles, for whatever worth that may have. Here, you can see me petting a Nubian goat (brought from Africa at some point in Britain's conquering of the free and not-so-free world) named Cooper, the newest arrival at the Sandburg property.

[Former Picture] One of the most strenuous parts of our vacation so far has been my trek up Big Glassy, to the Big Glassy lookout. It was a 1.3 mile trek to the top on a 110' slope. BG isn't the biggest mountain in the world, but it certainly kicked my tail, as I was out the rest of the day, completely exhausted from my climb. In the end, it was so worth it!

[Former Picture] Here's a picture of us, looking very similar to the picture above, at the goat farm.

All in all, we've had a wonderful time here in North Carolina. I met my love's paternal side of the family tonight, and they were so much fun! I think they liked me pretty well, and I liked them too! My love's stepmom is a wonderful cook! Yummy!

More to come! Tomorrow we are going to church and to a big ole father's day lunch.

Valete,

Magistra

Goin' to Carolina in my mind...

2009-06-19T07:23:00.000-07:00

Salvete!

We are officially at our second official destination! We've left the beach behind for the mountains. I've posted the state sign pictures for your enjoyment!

There were pictures in this post, but I took them out to preserve the anonymity of the blog.

[Former Picture] Here's the entrance to Georgia! We got caught in some traffic in Atlanta, but on the whole, the peach state didn't do us wrong too much! We had georgia on our mind for about four hours of the trip!

[Former Picture] South Carolina was unnotable. We were only there for about an hour. We went through Greenville--the only major city we saw. On the way into North Carolina, we got to see some very scenic views of the mountains. Beautiful!

[Former Picture] We finally made it to North Carolina last night around 8 pm EST. The mountains are breathtaking! My love drove up several precipitous driveways in order to reach the abode of his father, whom I have yet to meet. He is reportedly downstairs, but I have not ventured down there yet, as I am still pajama'd and unshowered.

[Former Picture] When we arrived last night, we got to see a fairy cottage! The house is absolutely adorable. I have only been in one other fairy cottage before, and that was K----'s, which is nestled in the hills outside of ------, TX. Check out the woodburning stove! My love's stepmom is very sweet, and they have an incredible shy dog named Misty. Hopefully she'll warm up to me eventually!

That's all I have for now! More to come! Tonight we plan to go to "Music on Main," where a live band plays on Main Street. We're going to have some BBQ at HubbaHubba's for dinner. So cute!

Valete,

Magistra

Stick shifts and safety belts!

2009-06-18T12:05:00.001-07:00

Salvete,

We're cruising I-85 in Alabama, rapidly approaching the Georgia border. We have about 90 more miles to go until Atlanta, and my love has just broken out the Chex Mix. After Atlanta, we'll hit up Greenville, then Hendersonville. My love is the most amazing driver, albeit slightly choleric when it comes to imbeciles driving around us.

I don't have any pictures for you at this moment, though I will probably post some later of the Georgia, South Carolina, and North Carolina borders. Get excited! I know I did when my love psyched me out, saying we were approaching the Georgia state line when we really weren't! Cameras ready!

Until then,

Valete,
Magistra

Zoo lose? No, I usually win.

2009-06-17T19:56:00.001-07:00

Salvete,

Today, my love and I had the brilliant idea to go check out the Gulf Shores Zoo. Well! It was an interesting experience, to be sure. Let's just say, that if PETA got wind of this operation, they would not be too happy. On the whole, the zoo's animals consisted of those you could buy from the pet store at the mall, minus the camels, wolves, black bears, tigers, lions, and alligators.

There were pictures in this post, but I took them out to preserve the anonymity of the blog.

[Former Picture] This is my love posing with the Siberian Tiger. Rawr!

[Former Picture] This is me, looking mighty sexy, by the same tiger.

[Former Picture] I did not zoom my camera for this one. This tiger was about two arm-lengths from where I was standing. Safety first!

[Former Picture] My love got bold and decided to interact with the wildlife. Of course, I'm not sure just how wild goats are. Did you know that Texas produces 94% of the nation's goats?

In other news, my love and I found a stellar sushi restaurant called Oki Japanese. We went there for dinner last night and tonight. If you are in Gulf Shores, drive on up 59 to Foley, and check out this amazing sushi restaurant. Next time I come through Gulf Shores, I know I'll be going there. Tonight, while we were eating, we talked to a man who was born in Abilene, and had moved to Alabama about 48 years ago (the guy was probably 60). He told us how he came in second in the Texas state pistol competition two years in a row. He must have been good! Apparently, he frequents that sushi restaurant (with good reason!). I recommend the Gulf Shores roll, the Dancing Eel roll, and the American roll. Amazing.

Tomorrow, we're off early to get to North Carolina at a decent hour. Let the next leg of our trip commence!

Valete,

Magistra

The seaweed is always greener...

2009-06-16T15:06:00.000-07:00

Salvete!

We've had our first day at the beach! The weather this morning was amazing, and we spent two or so hours lounging in the cool water. The last thirty minutes of our water-time was spent vainly trying to catch all of the little fish nibbling our legs! I didn't believe at first that there were fish, but at my love's insistence, I stayed still long enough to let the little ones have a bite, and I was hooked! I wanted to catch one, coming very close a few times. He caught several hermit crabs, the first of which I gave to a little girl swimming near us.

[Former Picture]

After our bodies were exhausted from the sun and the waves, we decided to hit up DeSoto's Seafood Kitchen for lunch. Abandoning the car, we walked across the road running parallel to the shore in order to catch a bite of lunch. My love had stuffed shrimp, and I had Coconut Shrimp (a specialty of the house). I'm still full!

[Former Picture]

After lunch, we walked around to souvenir shops. During our spree, my love was chased by a vicious shark! Luckily, my love conquered in the end. However, we'll be eating shark for the next thirty years, due to his conquest.

[Former Picture]

More to come, as this evening we are planning a rousing game of putt-putt golf!

Valete,
Magistra

On our way!

2009-06-16T08:18:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

After a great night of sleep, we are about to head out to go to the beach! Hopefully we can find a nice place on the ocean to eat lunch. Other planned activities include (but are not limited to): building a sand castle, going to a souvenier shop, catching crabs, and being in love.

We're on vacation!

Valete,
Magistra

We're at the Beach!

2009-06-15T19:09:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

That's right! My love and I are at the beach in Gulf Shores, Alabama! We had a long day of driving, and at the end of it, we are so tired that we just want to crash!

I found my wallet...I had shoved it into my suitcase at some point. Way to go, me.

I had posted pictures, but to preserve the anonymity of my blog, I have deleted them all!

[Former Picture] Entering Mississippi!

[Former Picture] Entering into Alabama!

[Former Picture] Going through a tunnel in Mobile!

So, those are our adventures so far! We've laughed a ton (well, I've laughed a ton, and he's laughed at me!). The parts where we haven't laughed are when I "lost" my wallet, and when my love thought he was going to run out of gas, but we had plenty left! We laughed after we got gas.

More to come!

Valete,

Magistra

Our Trip!

2009-06-15T11:08:00.000-07:00

Salvete!

Our trip has begun through nine states! We are jamming to Johnny Cash after our somewhat eventful trip to Houston. How could Houston ever be eventful, you ask, except for shootings and break-ins? Well! After getting gas with my love across from my apartment (after a brief stop there), we went to Chili's, and I noticed my wallet was gone. We had gone too far to go back to the gas station, so we called, and the jerk wouldn't go out and check to see if it was there. I've officially cancelled all of my credit cards and such. Luckily, however, I had put my depit card into my pocket when we got gas. It seems that every cloud does indeed have a silver lining!

As we approach Lake Charles, my love is serenading me! He just said, "And I am going to continue serenading you to the dulcet sounds of Pink Floydd!" Get me out of here!

Just kidding!

We should arrive in Gulf Shores, AL tonight. Tomorrow will be a day at the beach, as will the day after it. Thursday we will disembark from Gulf Shores and head towards North Carolina. Prepare for fun in the sun!

Valete,
Magistra

Auld Lang Syne...

2009-06-11T14:07:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

I don't know what it means, but it usually signifies the end of an old year and the beginning of a new year. The old year is definitely over, with all its farting, office referrals, graded papers, and seminars. I am so thankful to have been a part of the school in its first year of establishing itself, and becoming whatever it is that it is going to be. I will miss those kids more than I can say. I already do. I miss them greeting me every day, "Hey Miss, Hey Miss, Hey Miss!" I miss them sharing their hearts and minds with me. I miss their off topic questions and other general elements of obnoxion. I miss telling them things they had never heard about before, even though they think they already know it all.

Next year, there will be a whole new batch of children, in a whole new city...my home town! I got to walk around the school today, and boy! Did it ever bring back memories! They've completely redone the bandhall, adding a whole new wing to the school. Due to the bad storms yesterday, several leaks had been exposed when I walked through. It reminded me of last year, when the new building was always leaking, and we were always checking every nook and cranny after a big storm.

I have a lot to do to get ready for next year. Once my love and I come back from our Tour of the South, I imagine I will really put my nose to the grindstone. We're leaving Monday for almost a month. I'm more excited than I can say. I remember how beautiful Gulf Shores, AL is, and I hope it lives up to the glory of those memories so that my love can enjoy it just as much as I used to when we would go vacationing there as a family.

A No-Longer-New Teacher's List to Get Ready for Next Year:
1. Update procedures PowerPoint: I now know where I need to cut the fat. Dr. Harry Wong is all well and good, but I need to trim down some of the procedures I had in place at the beginning of last year. After your first year, you really figure out what procedures you are willing to commit to, and which ones just take more time than you have.
2. Find out the Sophomore curriculum and see what I can come up with in advance: Since I don't currently have access to the curriculum I will be teaching next year, there isn't much I can do with this yet. I do need to reread To Kill A Mockingbird, because I am fairly sure that will be in the curriculum. I wish I could remember what my department chair's name is. Maybe I have it in an e-mail somewhere.
3. Come up with a new system for handing back papers: My old system does not work, or was not executed in a manner that would lead to success. My current method was to give each child a folder, then file their papers in their folder. In theory, they would occasionally check those folders (which did not happen), and see how they were doing in the class (about which, as it turns out, they do not care until the last week of the grading period, at which time it is too late to help them).
4. Come up with a new system for handing in papers: My old system worked, but led to a messy desk and a stressed teacher. To turn in papers, they had to hand them to me. This limited their ability to pull someone else's paper out of the slot and copy it, but it also made me more apt to lose their papers (which led to some very angry children). I think I will have a bin with hanging folders. Each class will have an "In" folder, and each will have an "Out" folder. This way, they have a place to turn in, and a place to pick up. I can even designte a person to pass back papers, or they can be on a rotation or something.
5. Think about warm-ups (bell-ringers, or whatever): As I will be on the 1.5 hour period schedule, it would not hurt us to do warm-ups. Last year, I kept their journals in bins so they could pick them up when they came in to the room. My system of reading them and grading them broke down completely by the beginning of the third six-weeks, so this needs to be revamped.

I'll stop the list there. Really, all it comes down to is this: What are you willing to stick to and work on the WHOLE YEAR? Things suggested by Dr. Wong, like having the kids hold up two fingers when they need to go to the bathroom would work really well with elementary schoolers, but it isn't practical with high school. Anyway, that's all for now.

Valete,
Magistra

Almost done.

2009-05-26T14:59:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

I'm not sure if I have anything substantial to say...I just sort of feel like blogging.

On Thursday, I'm going to tell my kids that I am leaving. It is the last normal day of the year before finals begins and all that, and it feels like the right time to tell them. I was going to tell them Friday, but seventh period is taking their final that day, and I don't want them to be wigged out (in the event that my leaving would wig them out, which I'm not 100% sure that it would). Also, not all of 7th period will be there on Friday, since about ten of them are exempting the final. I will admit, I'm nervous about telling them. Oh well.

I guess that's all I have to say for today.

Valete,
Magistra

The farting continues.

2009-05-21T19:48:00.001-07:00

Salvete,

I was wrong about the farting thing being over. See the last post if you don't know what I'm talking about.

I think I've said before that one of the things I didn't expect was the sheer volume of paperwork involved in teaching. Since it is the end of the year, and everyone is tired and overwhelmed by extra work as it is, corporate has decided to increase the amounts of paperwork we teachers have to do tenfold. Fill out this report about electronics, take this two-minute survey, count the different demographics groups and the percentages of them that passed their sixth six weeks SFA, keep lists of who is exempting, keep lists of TAKS failures, keep lists of attendance because we won't have the attendance data for you until next Tuesday, finish filling out that half-sheet of paper we gave you 18 weeks ago (oh wait, you lost it? minus ten...), have your students do this survey and have it turned in yesterday, find and fill out the lavender colored LEP sheets, and it goes on and on. I am serious. I could come up with twice that list I just made of things they have asked us to do. Plus, we have to clean out our classrooms, write finals, grade everything, and still be out in the hallways during passing period. It is no wonder I stayed at work until six o'clock last night.

That's all for now. I have too much to do to be blogging.

Valete,
Magistra

Updating in Chunks, Without Clever Titles.

2009-05-16T05:26:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

I thought I'd update in pieces, since there is so much to tell. There are so many things that have been lost through my negligence, that I doubt I could ever capture for you the essence of the year gone by. I thoroughly regret not blogging all this time.

Let's continue with another troubled child.

We'll call this one Larry. He is out of control. He came into my class right before the English TAKS in February. I may have mentioned him driving me to my wit's end before. After four write-ups and multiple calls home, I have given up that tactic. I promised him candy if he was good (after telling him what "good" meant to me...it's important to define your expectations for them, or so I'm told...they actually just ignore whatever you say and get into trouble anyway), but he seems to have forgotten. Maybe I'll bring him a Carmello the last day of school. I have developed a certain affection for Larry, after all we've been through together. I still wish he'd pull up his pants, as he does not provide the same service other sagging students do in wearing gym shorts under their falling jeans. You may ask, "What is it Larry does, exactly, to irk you so?" Well, I can tell you.

First of all, the child is tardy. He is also perpetually out of his seat bugging other people. Or, for that matter, in his seat bugging other people (the rarer occurance). Or, out of his seat bugging me. Or, in his seat bugging me. My favorite moment, which I have probably shared with some of you, is when Larry tells me and the entire class, "MISS, I GOTTA FAWT! CAN I GO IN DA HAWL AND FAWT???" I have let him go out into the hall once (yes, this has happened more than once). However, his class period is during lunch, and he only wants to go in the hall to talk to people. So, now when he does it, I tell him to fart in his seat. The class begs me to let him go outside, but I just tell him to fart at his seat. Ever since I started that tactic, where he doesn't get to go outside, he has gradually asked me less and less to go outside and fart. Success!

There are other specific things I could bring up, but the lesson is this: sometimes, detentions and referrals and punishments don't work. This child is not afraid of principals. He's not afraid of his parents, and Heaven knows he's not afraid of me. It has taken some manipulating, and every day is a struggle, but things are getting better (now that we're on the home stretch). I might even miss Larry when it is time for me to go.

That's all for now.

Valete,
Magistra

Wow. I'm negligent.

2009-05-15T17:28:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

I haven't written in forever! It has been a busy semester, with a lot of stress and a lot of news.

I had, as you know, resigned from my job in hopes of finding another job in my hometown area. Well! I interviewed with two districts and got an offer yesterday from my alma mater. I have accepted it, and will be moving back into the area whence I came. I am both excited and very nervous, since, as someone pointed out on my Facebook, I will now be peers with people who used to be my superiors. I had already considered this, of course, and all weirdness that it will entail. I will be calling Dr. Courtney "Marty" and Ms. Kippes whatever name is her first name. I will be on the English II team. The woman I had for English II, Ms. Arnold, no longer works at the school, or has a different last name (unlikely), so that weirdness is removed. She wouldn't remember me anyway, since I hardly remember her, and she has had way more students than I have had teachers in the past ten years.

At least I won't have to go far for my ten year reunion.

In other news, the year is winding down. TAKS is completely over, and now we're just awaiting scores. The children are getting antsy, and I have turned in many for skipping (for some reason they like to skip outside of my room, even though it is on the main hallway of the school by the offices. They are just crying out for help).

The hardest thing for me this year was losing a student that I had worked hard with and for. We'll call him John. John had been a problem for me all year. He was in a gang, had been involved in numerous violent activities, and gave me attitude whenever he could muster it. He also was the sweetest thing, and could write very well (lovely cursive, and wonderful voice). However, his family situation was rough, and his position at my school was threatened. Through all the trials of the year, he and I had built a relationship in which he trusted me to come through for him and to take up on his behalf. He came to me in February and let me know that he was going to be withdrawn on the coming Friday. He also told me he had no idea where he would be if he was withdrawn. This upset me a great deal, as I had invested in this child, and he in my class. I went to the registrar, and got the correct forms sent to his class, which were signed by his mother and turned in in time to keep him in school. Two months later, he stopped coming to school. After a week, I was concerned, so I e-mailed the registrar to ask her where he was and what could I do. She told me that his situation was bad again, and that he would probably be withdrawn. The following week, I got his withdrawal notice, to home school. When they withdraw to "home school" it basically means they are dropping out.

It was some comfort when I got an e-mail from the registrar saying that she had told John's mom that I had asked about him and been concerned, his mom seemed genuinely touched that I had taken the time to ask about her son. John is a special kid, with difficult circumstances, and I did everything I could to help him. He'll be in my prayers and memory forever.

Anyway, maybe I'll write more tomorrow. That's enough for today.

Valete,
Magistra

Roamin' (Roman...)

2009-03-17T16:22:00.000-07:00

Ciao from Italia!

I am sitting in the lobby of an Italian hotel! I have been in Rome for two days, and tomorrow I am going to Pompeii and Sorento. It is almost 12:30 here, so I need to go to bed soon. I will post pictures when I return. In the mean time, pray for patience and a low occurrence of high-stress activities.

Ciao,
Melissa

From TAKSing to Relaxing

2009-03-14T14:41:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

I survived TAKS. It wasn't nearly as bad as everyone said it would be. I had good kids in my room, a third of which were mine, and the children finished fairly quickly without incident or complaint. Future teachers, do not fear the TAKS Test Day. It is basically a good day, where you don't have to plan anything, and do what you are told.

Whether or not the children passed has yet to be seen.

Two weeks ago (or so), I had an "issue" with one of my co-workers. I will forgo the gory details. I didn't handle it well, and neither did my co-worker. I have now been added to the other teacher's black list (shout out to all my FFXI peeps...). Team meetings have resumed as normal, except she doesn't talk to me, and I don't talk to her. I act completely relaxed around her, and when she passes me in the hall she looks straight ahead with the dreaded stony eyes. At these times, I chuckle to myself. Grow up, woman. And don't you ever wag your finger at me again.

In other news, I turned in my resignation last week. I will officially be moving back to Dallas come summer. I have no doubt that this is the right thing to do. I love my apartment here, and my co-workers are good (minus the one; see above), but it is time to go. I hate this city. My superiors all know, but none of my peers or students are aware as yet. I'm going to tell my co-workers maybe the last week of school, and my students the last day, if they haven't figured it out by then. The resignation process was painless. I was going to wait until much later to execute it. However, the powers that be could not start looking for a replacement for me until I had officially resigned.

In reference to Alyssa's post from last time, I have heard about Rafe and his methods. I wish I had the tenacity and energy to do what he does. I plan to change a lot of things next year about how I manage my classroom and the quality of work I will take. A lot of the time, the problem is not that they get less than 90% on an assignment--it is that the students turn in nothing. How to make them redo, when they do not at all? How to make them understand, or write legibly with academic standards in English, when they cannot write well in their native language? This is a problem we face in Texas, among other places with a high immigrant population. Rafe overcomes it...LA has a huge influx of immigrants not just from Spanish-speaking countries, but from countries of many other tongues. Alyssa, I also recommend I am a Pencil by Sam Swope. It is incredible, and I think about him sometimes when I am feeling lost as to how to handle a situation.

I relate better to Sam than to Rafe, because Rafe seems to have it all together. He can make those kids perform (literally...they put on a Shakespeare play every year with fifth graders). Sam is just starting out. He has no clue what he is doing. I relate to him in other ways, but this is the main way.

Wednesday...we had a mouse in the classroom in third period. Those children! They are hysterical! Third period is my favorite right now. They are a little flaky, but lovable. I had gangstas and cholos standing on their chairs in sheer terror of a tiny mouse that was nowhere near their seats. I had JROTC students cowering in fear from a little rodent. What innocence! I rarely get to see that out of them. The situation was handled, and the one child who knew about the mouse in fourth period swore to keep the creature a secret. He and I both know what would happen if fourth period found out there was a rodent. Half the class would be looking for it, and the other half would be screaming. I pseudo-lied to seventh period. They saw the mouse traps (humane, of course) and asked whether I had a rat. I told them that I most certainly did not have a rat (not a lie...it was a mouse). Also, I told them that those traps had been there for a while. Had they not noticed them? To these children, "a while" can equal forty-five seconds, so the traps had indeed been there "a while" in their lives.

I'm a horrible person.

Friday...I ended up pushing the emergency call button to get a child escorted from my classroom. One of my students, for whom I've done a lot, decided to be belligerent, disrespectful, disruptive, and a general ass. I got the AP to come get him out of my classroom, and wrote the child up. When I carried down the completely-filled referral form, the principal saw it and asked, "Whoa, who is that for?" I answered her, and she said, "He is so unpleasant!" You know that if this principal says something negative about a student, that student must be a little hellian.

Finally, I'm going to Italy tomorrow. We are taking some kids. It is going to be insane! I am going to miss my love immensely. He is coming home in three weeks, though! Hurry home, darling!

Valete,
Magistra

Fighting vainly the old ennui...

2009-02-28T09:55:00.000-08:00

Salvete.

I passed my PPR. That's good. For any layperson reading this who does not know what the PPR is, it is the Pedagogy and Professional Responsibility test. That is a fancy name for "The test that keeps you from your certification if you fail it." That was the gateway I had required myself to pass through in order to [re]begin applying to districts in the Dallas area. I knew I was going to pass it, but I wanted to be able to tell my (hopefully) future employers that I was ready and able to apply for my permanent certificate.

Here are a few tips for the day you go take your PPR.
-Get there hella early. Those proctors are grouchy. Being late is extremely stressful.
-Print out your entry ticket off of the ETS website. Those proctors are grouchy.
-Do not forget your driver's license. Those proctors are grouchy.
-The ETS website may very well tell you the wrong room number. My test was in a completely different building than ETS told me.
-Bring two pencils (duh).
-Eat breakfast. OMG. That test is long, and boring. If you are easily distracted, hunger will work as well as anything to take your mind off of what you are doing.
-The classroom on the PPR is not a real classroom. It is a classroom in fairy tale land. These are not real scenarios. These are not real teachers. You know this is the case because you have cooperative parents, twenty students in a class, and every material you could ever want at your fingertips.
-When you are done, get out of there and go have a drink.

In other news, I am tired of this school year. Here is a list of the things of which I have become tired:
-gossip
-laziness
-team meetings where we don't anything done
-disrespectful children (not just towards me, but towards each other)
-tardies
-absences
-paperwork
-pressure
-TAKS
-early wake-ups
-late work

I'm sure there's more, but I am moving on. Here is a list of things I like about teaching:
-sweet children
-helpful parents
-PTA, or VIPS, or whatever it is called
-getting off work
-tutorials
-my coworkers
-Latin
-Microsoft PowerPoint

Eh, that's all the effort I can put into the good list.

I'm still feeling disillusioned. I've been sort of depressed the last week or so. Getting to see my love last weekend helped a lot, and hanging out last night with my friend who has recently moved here also helped. I haven't been home since January 4th, and that is wearing on me. However, when I am home, I want to be at my apartment where things are convenient and I know where everything is. Alas! Eheu! It seems we are never satisfied.

In keeping with the spirit of today's apparent theme of bulleted lists, here is a list of things I want to do differently next year, from the outset:
-refuse to take crappy work.
-enforce deadlines...if you don't turn it in, I'm not taking it beyond three days late.
-I do this with Latin now, but I didn't from the outset: have the missing assignment sheet for the kids to sign and give a reason if they don't have their work.
-if you want to borrow a pencil, you have to give me something in return. I will be holding all loanable writing utensils hostage.
-call parents more often
-find a different way to hand back graded papers
-find a more efficient way for kids to turn their papers in (right now they have to put the paper in my hand to turn it in, which isn't too bad, but it confuses some of them)
-put a stamp or a check or something on their journal every day when they do it. It will be easier to keep track of credit.
-show them how I want the journal set up. TIP: MODEL EVERYTHING

That's all for now.

Valete,
Magistra

We shall be free..

2009-02-20T20:34:00.000-08:00

..of the TAKS test in 2011 or something.

In the mean time, salvete!

Tomorrow is the school's "TAKS Blitz." This is a day when we all come together (kicking and screaming, mind you) in order to play motivational music and practice for the TAKS test. For the day of the actual test, I have been "randomly selected" as a proctor. Translation: I have to stay in a room for seven hours with children I most likely do not know, read predetermiend, approved responses, and ensure that I do not sit down for the entire time. Also, we must not spill food on the tests, because getting the test booklets dirty would be considered an "irregularity," and such things are not okay.

I knew TAKS was going to happen at some point, but I hoped it would be something that would happen to someone else. There are alternate proctors, but these characters will be popping in and out, making sure the main proctor (me) doesn't need any restroom breaks or the like. To make an already horrible situation worse (we can read, we can't sit, we can't play on the computer, etc), there are no windows in my proctoring classroom. This will lead to a depression which will, no doubt, lead to me hurting one of the more obnoxious students.

There is at least one positive in the TAKS Blitz tomorrow. If a child is unruly in any way, we are encouraged to kick them out without warning. This means no extra credit for attending, no free lunch, and (most distressingly to the student, no doubt) no TAKS tutorials. It also does not, in any way, resemble what normal class is actually like.

I'm tired, and disillusioned (for tonight).

Valete,
Magistra

Wanna Join My Coven?

2009-02-05T14:46:00.000-08:00

Salvete,

I picked up a note today that said the following (in paraphrase):

Male Student: What's cookin' good lookin'? LOL!
Female Student: Nothing...do you know anything about Wicca? You got a religion?
MS: Not much...I'm a Christian but I don't go to church.
FS: It's about being kind to people and nature. Wanna join my coven?

This is the stage of the note-passing at which I plucked the note from their guilty fingers. I don't know if I wrote this last week (and I'm too tired from work to check...) but I picked up another note that was practically pornographic last Friday. BLEH! Oh, the things going through the minds of these little ones...I see girls with their breasts practically falling out of their shirts, and I want to say, "Do you know what boys are thinking when they see you like that? Because I assure you, you wouldn't like it. You may want them to notice you, but they would do that even if you had on a nun's habit. I promise." Teenage boys are disgusting.

Forgive the seeming disjointedness of that last paragraph. I just needed to get it all out there.

There was an interdepartmental coworker issue today between one of my English Team Members (ETM) and Foreign Language Team Members (FLTM). ETM routinely refuses entry to children if they are late, and also routinely ejects children from class if they are unruly. I have every respect for this teacher's methods. I wish I were more like her (she is what they call a "Hard Ass" and is greatly revered by both her students and her team). FLTM found one of ETM's (r)ejected students wandering, and, without knowing the whole story, went to our principal to let her know what was going on. What is wrong with reporting ETM, you say? I can hear the advocates of sound educational theory now: The children have to be in class to learn! The children should not be wandering the halls! That teacher obviously does not care about that child's cognitive development!

I say, HA! But anyway, here is why what FLTM did was wrong. Most obviously, FLTM broke the chain of command. In the workplace (yes, even in the public schools) there is a chain of command that must be followed. This chain keeps the Highest-Ups from having to deal with every little issue that arises. FLTM should have gone first to ETM's team leader, then to her department chair, and THEN to the principal if the problem persisted in such a way that FLTM was unsatisfied with its outcome. However, FLTM broke that chain and went straight to the top, violating the prerogatives we have as teachers to govern our classroom as we see fit. A few other things that should not have happened: FLTM misquoted and therefore misrepresented ETM's take on the situation, and FLTM did not discuss the issue/misunderstanding with ETM first.

The moral of the story is, pay attention to the way you treat your coworkers. If you have a problem with the way someone else runs their classroom, talk to them first, and then follow the chain of command from there. And just know that not everyone has the same ideas about Classroom Management that you do.

Valete,
Magistra

It's just 'round the corner--you'll make it!

2009-01-29T17:49:00.000-08:00

Salvete,

I hate to be obvious, but because I couldn't find a YouTube video that I wanted, the Title of Today is actually from "Love Actually," where Colin Firth's slut girlfriend tells him she feels sick and he can still make the wedding. Alyssa's comment on the previous post inspired the title.

Friday is indeed just 'round the corner. Tomorrow, in fact! Tuesday, my co-worker came up to me and goes, "It's only Tuesday. We're not even halfway there yet." Wednesday, someone else came up to me and griped about the fact that it wasn't even Thursday yet. Today, I thought it was Friday.

All this to say, this week was long. The new kids in my classes are getting used to one another, and this creates more chatting. More chatting creates less listening, and less listening creates less focused activity. Not that there's much of that in high school classrooms anyway.

I lost my voice yesterday. The temperature dropped from 80 to 30 overnight, leading to vocal cord trauma. I awoke with a sore throat, wondering how I was going to cope with the children. Then, I remembered that I had given fourth period quite a few successful silent treatments when they were my worst class. If I could handle my worst class without speaking, surely I could handle all five classes with no voice.

As it turns out, I was correct (of course), and the day went reasonably smoothly.

Seventh period has been my out-of-control class lately. I don't know if it is because my numbers went up to 32 (as previously mentioned) or what, but I do know that now they have become monkeys. The grace of God was granted me, however, when I opened my gradebook this morning to find that my loudest class clown was transferred to a different class. I had mixed feelings about this transferrance. I like this kid. He's smart (and a smart mouth). He is a good writer (and a good distracter of others). He's personable (and vulgar). The other kids like him (the other kids also can't stand him). On the whole, seventh period ran much smoother today.

If you are looking for stories (Bret), here they are:

Story 1 of 3: I was walking back from my team meeting today when I saw a young man [still] wandering the halls. I asked him if he had a pass, and he very honestly told me no. I asked him where he was going, and he pointed, very honestly, down the hallway. I asked him where he was supposed to be, and he said that he was supposed to be in the office. I pointed out that he was walking in the opposite direction of the office, and he evasively told me that he had health right then. I asked why he wasn't in health, and he said that he walked out. Such honesty from one so-about-to-be-in-trouble! Anyway, the lunch bell rang, and he told me he was supposed to be at lunch. I asked his name, and he told me, which was nice of him, and I went to the AP to let her know about Mr. ---. She said she was already calling him in that day anyway, so she'd talk to him. These kids are too much.

Story 2 of 3: I was sorting out the kids' spirals when I found one with a five-pointed crown on it. Apparently, this is the symbol of the gang, the Latin Kings. I turned in the spiral. We are obligated to report gang-related activities. The student was not very friendly to me later in the day, so we'll see how that goes tomorrow in class.

Story 3 of 3: As the other teachers and I were sweeping the kids out of the building at the end of the day, I saw an infamous child, formerly from my Latin class. He had been shipped off to alternative school at the start of the third six weeks. I had been anticipating his return, hoping he wouldn't be put back in Latin. Anyway, as I walked down the main hallway, I saw him in a confrontation with one of my co-workers. Mr. X was asking him to take off his hat, which the child refused to do, and his friends were pretty much holding him back as he cussed and lunged at Mr. X. As it turns out, the child wasn't even supposed to be on campus, which makes him a Trespasser. I doubt the child will be returning to our campus for some time. Which is fine with me.

If you were wondering, yes, I got my voice back for today. However, I think I'm running a fever and my throat is still sore. We'll see what happens!

I miss my love terribly.

Valete,
Magistra

NKotB

2009-01-21T16:35:00.000-08:00

Salvete,

Today was my first day of the new semester, even though it was everyone else's second. I had so many new students today! I now have 32 in my 7th period class. This is problematic, as I only have 30 desks/chairs. Luckily, two of the 32 were absent, so the children fit perfectly into my little classroom. Precious.

The assignment that I left the Latin kids was to write me a letter regarding their thoughts on how last semester went--what I could do better, what they could do better, what they liked, what they didn't like, what challenged them, etc. The letters came out pretty much how I expected. I wish I had brought them home so I could exerpt them. They were so cute! Everyone's letters that I got loved the class. One of the major strands throughout all of the letters was that they like my charismatic personality and teaching style. I wasn't surprised at this, but still was flattered. As a first year teacher, you doubt yourself and your skill, but the kids help so much to boost your self-esteem back up again (after working so hard to tear it down in the first place...).

As much negativity as I put forth in this blog at the beginning, I hope I can respond with more positivity now. Things are better...they are so much better that I actually find myself happy to walk into the school in the mornings. Outrageous, I know (refer to entry on October 15th). Teaching is stressful. Teaching builds character (a.k.a. Teaching is painful). Teaching is trying. But! Teaching is also rewarding in ways I never thought it could be. The things I say every day may very well stick with these kids forever.

Today in tutorials, I taught a girl how to understand inequalities as exhibited on a number line. She is one of my English students, but she needed help in math. Her math teacher wasn't there, so she came to my class to do her work. I was so glad to help her with something besides English. I can't put my finger on why that was so rewarding, seeing her grasp the idea that the circle is filled in if the inequality is "equal to" whatever. Maybe it is because in English, the concepts are more abstract, and seeing if the students are "getting it" takes more time and patience. In math, you get instant gratification if a student can figure out the concept. Bret, this is the part where you make some snide remark about Liberal Arts.

That's all for today, I guess.

Valete,
Magistra

A.W.O.L.

2009-01-20T19:21:00.000-08:00

Salvete,

Yes, I have been A.W.O.L. I blame my new fascination with RPGs. Don't ask.

My love is gone, and has been for 1.5 months. He will return in April. Until then, starting now, I will try to do better with updating this thing.

I have several comments about the past few months which I will now put forth.

First on my mind is this: I love these children. I love them. I didn't mean to fall in love with them, but I have, and it takes its toll. They are my kids. Mine. I suprise myself by missing them when I am not around them, say, over Thanksgiving or Christmas break. They are all so individual--another thing I did not expect. While each one is like the other, each one is also very different from his peers, no matter how much he tries to be the same. They are like precious jewels, and I ache to know what will become of some of them. For many, the future is not promising, but I try not to look at that. I try to focus on how each one is succeeding now. Sometimes, this can be really hard, because they can all be major pains. But, at the end of the day, when I leave, I love them all over again, and I love them even more the next day when I walk into the school building.

Next, no one tells you exactly how much work the end of the semester is. I practically had a stinking anxiety attack on Friday, trying to get everything ready to turn in. My paperless district had me turn in page after page of grade print-outs, each of which prints an exra blank page. There are about fifty different types of reports to choose from, and the school has randomly selected two or three (I'm still not sure which) of these to be printed and turned in. Figuring out which three, and in what order, and for what six weeks, is not easy, and likens itself to pulling out one's adult teeth. I had to call fifteen-plus parents to let them know their children are failing for the six weeks or for the entire semester. All I can say is, learn Spanish. It will help so much: [student name] no esta pasando la classe de [class name]. No esta trabajando en la classe de [class name], y no tarea tambien. If anyone can give me a better way to say that last part, I would appreciate it.

Third, children skip class. If you ever want to be a teacher, you should know this. Of course, I had heard of skipping, but never took part in it myself, being perfect. I had students with upwards of 40 absences for the semester. Let's think about this: The semester is 18 weeks long, times five days per week, which yields 90 instructional days. Having 40 absences is a huge deal. This means you came to class a little more than half the time. WHAT?!?!?! I know. It never crossed my mind in high school either.

Fourth, don't trust the little angels. Yes, I love them, but I lock up my crap, especially since I had my iPod stolen. I think I know who did it, but I have no proof whatsoever. It broke my heart when I found that my iPod was gone, because I wanted to think the best of them all. Most of them were shocked when I told the classes what happened, but some of them said, "Miss, you can't trust the students. Leave stuff out, especially around here, and it will be gone." They know their peers better than anyone, I suppose. So, take it from me. Your students are not more honest or above reproach than anyone else's. Lock up your stuff. Leave your valuables at home. If it will make you upset to lose it or have it broken, don't bring it to school.

I'm sure I have other insights, but I'm very tired. I drove to Louisiana yesterday and drove back today to see my love. I miss him so much, but I know that this visit will help get me through the next two and a half months. At least, I hope so. Darling, I love you.

Valete,
Magistra

My love is home!

2008-11-08T07:46:00.001-08:00

Salvete,

My love is home, which is why I haven't been blogging. Blogging will resume when he leaves.

Valete,
Magistra

I'm Happy and Grumpy (or, Whistle While You Work)

2008-10-27T18:15:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

Because I showered last night, I did not have to get up early this morning to take a shower. The result? I was grouchy for the first three periods this morning. I know myself better than to pull such shananigans. I need a shower to wake up in the morning.

However, I will probably shower tonight, because I am being forced to go to a TAKS training tomorrow morning. In order to demonstrate my rebellion, I will attend in a bad mood. That will show them.

My beloved went to Dallas for the day, in order to accomplish several objectives needing to be dealt with. I am alone right now, but he should be home soon. I am glad he's not at sea right now. For some reason, it seems like this is going to be a long week, and having him here makes everything a thousand times better.

Third period, for some reason, has turned into a very good class. Maybe it seems so good because it is right before fourth period. Proximity lends itself to contrast, and fourth period is terrible, making third look that much better. We'll see if the good behavior in third persists. I can't even put my finger on what exactly has caused the improvement (except for my guess that fourth is becoming increasingly worse). I thought seventh was sort of bad, but my department chair has assured me that they are not (see previous post).

I've begun employing a new tactic to get students to turn stuff in. I list the assignment on the board, and put down their names if they haven't turned it in. I may have mentioned in a previous post that I've started doing this. Today, however, I decided to take it one step farther. I made a list on the board of all the students who are failing. This is legal because I am not listing their exact grade. Hopefully, this will cause some of them to see that they cannot go through my class and not turn in work. Just coming to class is not enough. There must actually be some sort of partakage.

I heard about another teacher who is a friend of the family having to report a child to CPS. I can't imagine having to do this. I haven't noticed any abuse signs in any of my students. I wonder if I would recognize the signs if they were there.

I'm going to go get a shower.

Valete,
Magistra

I can hear the bells...

2008-10-24T10:52:00.001-07:00

Salvete,

I am currently in Austin, TX, preparing to attend the wedding of my dearest friend. I can't believe she is getting married. Hopefully, some day, it will be my turn, but I count it one of the greatest gifts I have received to be a part of the goings on related to her wedding.

The children have a substitute today. They will survive. I'm trying not to think about it too much. Four periods have gone by, and the sub is on a nice long break so that they can prepare mentally for seventh.

My department chair for English came in yesterday. She was making her rounds, trying to see how everyone is doing in their respective classrooms. She came during seventh period, which is probably the best time of day she could have come, except for second (Latin). Her feedback was positive, saying that my kids obviously felt comfortable with me, and that I had fostered a positive environment in there. It's a good thing she didn't come during fourth! Actually, I might have liked to have her in there during fourth to give me some ideas, because I'm not sure what to do with them. See the following paragraph for an explanation.

On Tuesday, fourth was unmanageable. I couldn't get their attention, and they were rowdy. Finally, I told them that I was through with them, and they were hereafter responsible for their own education in my class, until I decided that they had earned a teacher. I informed them that when they came in the next day, I would have a slide posted with they day's directions, and that if they didn't do the work, that was up to them, and they could get themselves a zero. So, the next day, I did what I said I was going to do. I didn't talk to them for the whole of 50 minutes. I ignored every request, everything they asked me. I had the slide posted with specific instructions, and most of them actually did the work. Some of them were slacking, and got told off by fellow students who were upset that they weren't getting taught. I even got an apology note from one of them.

Yesterday, I had to talk to them because they were having a test. They asked me (while they had me talking) if theirs was the only class receiving this treatment. I told them they were. I also told them that the silence would resume on Monday upon my return (they knew they were having a sub today). We'll see how it goes.

One of my holy terrors in fourth period has now been moved from one Spanish class to another. His first day in the new Spanish class, he was good. The second day, he was kicked out. He proceeded to come by my room, for whatever reason, and asked if he could hang out. I asked him if Mr. X had kicked him out, and he said yes. I asked him if he was supposed to go to his AP, and he said that Mr. X hadn't specified. I went in and sent his AP an e-mail, and told him that she would be expecting him. Still, he lingered, and disrupted my class for a few minutes longer. The next day, Mr. X kicked him out again. Again, he came by my room and disrupted my class. This time, his AP had called him out of class, and he was on his way to her office. No one is exactly sure what to do with this kid.

Valete,
Magistra

Week of Insanity.

2008-10-19T11:13:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

This week has been OUT OF CONTROL. I will explain.

Tuesday (the first day back...we had Monday off): Got to work around 6:15. Worked like crazy until 2:50, when I sneaked out of the building to avoid having to attend a faculty meeting. I did not do this sneaking without reason or permission. Reason: I had to attend a seminar on how to rate ESL student writing from 4:30-8. Permission: via my team leader for English I. I ran home, got some stuff together, and ran up to our staff development center, where I proceded to "listen" for three and a half hours. I then ran home, and went almost directly to bed.

Wednesday: Got to work around 6:15. Attended a make-up faculty meeting, because I didn't have enough to do. The sophomores took the PSAT, so the schedule was all messed up. I had periods 1st through 3rd 20 minutes longer than I usually have them, which created meyhem for my day's pacing. Upside: 7th period did not meet because of the extended 1st-3rd periods, so my last period of the day to teach was 4th. After school, I ran to HEB to get supplies for cornbread and cake. I then went to the rest of that seminar until around 7:30. Silver lining: I got to talk to my love :) After the seminar, I ran home and whipped up some from-scratch cornbread (easy as Corn-Kits, and tastes better). I stayed up too late (talking to my love, so it was ok), but got to sleep eventually.

Thursday: Got to work around 6:15. Taught my extremely chatty children until 2:30, then had a meeting about going to Italy. That lasted until 4:30, then I sat and talked with two of the other chaperones until 5:15. I ran to the taqueria, got a taco for dinner, and went to 25 minutes of the JV game. We were winning when I left, but that did not last (eheu!). One good side of today was that we had the chili cook-off for which I cooked the cornbread. Our team did not win, but I got free lunch, so that was good. We had chili cook-off t-shirts. They are "sexy," according to one of my girls in 3rd period. After the game, I talked to my love, and made a heart-shaped cake for the bachelorette party I attended/threw this weekend.

Friday: Got to work around 6:15. Taught my out of control chatty children until 2:30. I then met with my principal about applying to Dallas districts. I really respect and admire her. She was supportive, but also encouraged me to think over my options and really give Houston a chance. She promised she was going to give me good references, which was relieving. I'm going to put my reference form in her box this week, because those are due next week to one of the ISDs to which I am applying. That is the only one that has that kind of deadline, otherwise, I would wait a little longer so as not to appear to eager to leave. I assured her I would finish out the year with gusto. After that meeting, I ran home, made icing, iced the cake (if I never see pink icing again, that will be ok), got my skirt altered, packed, and drove to Austin to meet my mother, the bride-to-be, and the mother of the bride for dinner.

It was very refreshing to see some of my girlfriends this weekend.

Valete,
Magistra

The weeks get longer...

2008-10-15T13:34:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

Even though this is a four-day week, it feels about like a sixty day week. And it is only Wednesday. WOW. I worked for 13.5 hours yesterday. While I usually do work about 10 hours a day, 3.5 of yesterday was spent in a professional development seminar. 3.5 more hours will be spent in said seminar this evening.

I made a list in the seminar yesterday of careers I could take on other than teaching. Here is the list (in no particular order):
1. Vet clinic (again).
2. Office management.
3. Editing.
4. Graduate school.
5. Lecturer.
6. Waitress (no, I'm not kidding OMG OMG).
7. Merchandizer (again).
8. Secretary.
9. Assistant of some kind.
10. Resume writer.
11. Pet sitter (isn't that what I already do? Oh, wait, no--that's babysitting).
12. PR.
13. HR.
14. Astronaut (kidding).

Any other ideas? I'll take them. I've begun applying to other districts. They are all in the D/FW area. Maybe I shouldn't write that on here, in case some of my coworkers get ahold of this blog. I have set up an appointment to meet with my principal on Friday to let her know that at the end of the year, I'm out of here. Really, I'm meeting with her because I'm going to need her as a reference. I really like her, and all of my coworkers, but I'm just not sure I want to stay in this area. If I do keep teaching, I know that it is going to be in D/FW. I hate Houston.

I wrote up a kid again. I wrote this one up last week too. And I will continue to write her up until she isn't in my class anymore. Maybe this is the wrong attitude, but whatever. You just can't act like that and not face some sort of consequences. These kids think they deserve respect. What they deserve is a spanking. You don't deserve respect. You earn it. Do you think I earned the respect of my elders and peers by being late all the time, swearing at them, breaking rules, refusing to work, etc? No. I got it by hard work. By doing what I am supposed to do.

I am supposed to finish my masters, and that means sticking with this job for the rest of the year. My parents taught me never to quit. I want to quit, but I am not going to. I am going to see this damn thing through to the end. Maybe I'll even learn something or grow personally in some way. I'm not sure how I could help but do so, really. Perserverance builds character.

Valete,
Magistra

Mythology, mythology! There's nothing like mythology!

2008-10-10T15:25:00.000-07:00

Salvete!

For the title reference, go to http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XFPKbg_dKyg at the 1:03 mark. Then, go see "Cats."

7th period was wild today! I never cease to wonder at the difference a group of kids can make when they are put together a certain way. Class chemistry is extremely important, and my 7th period class has chemistry. Here's a list of things that regularly go on in that class:
-The children tell each other they find each other annoying.
-They beg me not to sit next to this or that individual, even though I had no intention of putting them next to that person in the first place.
-They make lewd jokes.
-They swear excellently in their writing, usually for emphasis.
-They ask great questions.
-A few of them seem to have a particular disability that involves needing to rise from one's seat when speaking. This disability also applies to getting things out of their bag. In order to get out a supply, the students afflicted with this strage disease have to stand up, pull their bags off of their backs (because they sit with their backpacks on, for whatever reason), get out their items, put their bags back on their backs, and then sit down again.
-They are tremendously funny. I would never tell them this, but sometimes, when I'm trying to discipline them, it is all I can do not to crack up at everything they say.

3rd period, on the other hand, has some kind of chemistry that keeps them all from excelling. I sometimes think that it must be me, because they are the first class of the day in which I teach English. Periods 1 and 2 are Latin. In 3rd, not only is it my class with students who need In Class Support, but it is also the class when I don't really know what I am doing yet. By 7th period, I am a well-oiled machine (sometimes), but in 3rd, I just sort of fumble along. After I am done blaming myself, I realize that it is just the class's chemistry. Fourth period sort of gimps along between 3rd and 7th, having no real personality of its own. It has some characters, though. There are some interesting issues in that class that I probably can't discuss legally on here.

With the six weeks being officially over, we are starting a new unit! This unit has to do with mythology. I introduced it to them today, and they were so excited! A co-worker had told me that the kids don't do well at mythology, so I'm going to have to keep up their momentum. Today went better than I could have hoped. They were riveted to the lesson. The thing that clinched it for me, I believe, was the warm-up. I have not been following my team's warm-ups. I make up my own. Today, to introduce the unit, I had the kids tell ghost stories, then introduced mythology as the idea of the Ancient Greeks telling each other stories to explain weird occurances and other such things. They ate it up. I felt like one of those teachers you see in a documentary.

Anyway, my dear friend will be here soon, and we are going to get dinner. I haven't talked to my love in almost 3 days...I am missing him so badly! Hopefully I will get to talk to him tonight!

Valete,
Magistra

They aren't all bad...

2008-10-09T16:33:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

Good things in my day:
1. The children had tests in both English and Latin. This is good because it gave me lots of time to grade. They are also required to be silent, and I can hold zeroes over their heads as a penalty for talking.

2. After school, I had two girls come in to make up work. It makes me happy when children come in to make up work, because it is a reminder that some of them do care, if only a little, and if only at the end of the six weeks.

3. After school, one of the students who was only in my class for about the first week and a half of school stopped in on his way by. He was just the sweetest thing when he was in my class, and contributed so much to every discussion. I had been very sad when he was put in one of my co-worker's classes. Anyway, he stopped at the door and said, "Hi, Ms. ____!" I greeted him by name, and he told me he just had to stop in and say hi to his favorite teacher. He gave me a hug, and I laughed, thanked him, and reminded him that I wasn't his teacher anymore. He said he wished he were still in my class, because it was his favorite class. We talked for a minute about his new class, and about the Me Boards around the room. He went on his way after that.

4. After the young man and young ladies had gone, two other young ladies, neither of whom I had ever seen before, stopped by and asked if I had anything they could do to get volunteer hours, even though they were not my students. I had them take down and un-tape all of the Me Boards so that the children can take them home tomorrow. They chatted with me and with each other, and it was generally pleasant not to be in there by myself, and not to have to do all of that taking down and untaping by myself.

True, I was at school today from 5:59 AM to 5:57 PM, but it was worth it. I got a lot (albeit not everything) done. I can do the rest tomorrow. All of my grading is done for the six weeks, except late work, which the children may or may not turn in. Minus a headache, things are looking pretty okay. Tomorrow is jeans day, I have a 3-day weekend, I get to go swing dancing on Sunday night, and I might get to talk to my love tonight. Euge (that's Latin for "hooray," according to my students' text)!

Valete,
Magistra

It Won't Make You Feel Better.

2008-10-08T16:42:00.001-07:00

Salvete,

Yesterday, I yelled at my kids for the first, and I pray the last, time. Everyone loses their cool from time to time, but it sure did not make me feel any better once I had gotten it out of my system. In fact, I felt worse, and ended up apologizing to the class. My mother will tell you, I can be volatile. Usually, though, I only lash out at her.

I wrote two of them up. That made me feel better.

As the end of the six weeks approaches, everyone is in panic mode. Surely I am not the only one in the world who keeps up with grades. Everything is graded except for journals that the kids have taken out of the classroom against my orders, and tests that the kids have not taken yet. It seems like my co-workers are rushing around like mad to get things put together. I am just watching in amazement that their heads do not fall off. My secret? I use my conference period wisely, and I stay at school from 6am to 4:30 or 5pm. I take care of e-mails and paperwork right when they come across my desk. I check my e-mail often, and enter grades in the computer as soon as they are marked on the paper. Everyone has their system, and I guess I have mine. I have always been super efficient, even (and especially, it seemed at the time) when taking 18 hours in college.

Here's a shout-out to my team for bearing with me when I was in a tremendously bad mood yesterday in our team meeting. None of them reads this (they do not know it exists), so a lot of good it does.

Valete,
Magistra

Boom De Ya Da!

2008-10-06T18:46:00.000-07:00

Salvete,

All I can think about is that Discovery Channel commercial, so it will go in my blog.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=at_f98qOGY0

I love the mountains!
I love the clear blue sky!
I love big bridges!
I love when great whites fly!
I love the whole world,
And all its sights and sounds!
Boom de ya da, boom de ya da,
Boom de ya da, boom de ya da!

I love the ocean!
I love real dirty things!
I love to go FAST!
I love Egyptian kings!
I love the whole world,
And all its craziness!
Boom de ya da, boom de ya da,
Boom de ya da, boom de ya da!

I love tornadoes!
I love arach-a-nids (I do not)!
I love hot magma!
I love the giant squids!
Boom de ya da, boom de ya da,
Boom de ya da, boom de ya da!
2X

YAY!

I know this has nothing to do with my school, but oh well. It is what is on my mind. Besides my love.

Valete,
Magistra

Too Many E-Mails, Parent Phone Calls, Too Little Water

2008-10-03T16:23:00.000-07:00

Salvete...

I get about a million e-mails a day from various people. Then, I get duplicates of those when the original e-mails get forwarded to me. I check my email about four times during the school day, and that is hardly enough time to keep up.

I called about thirty parents this week. I spoke with maybe ten, but the ten with whom I spoke were very supportive, albeit surprised that their child was failing or misbehaving or whatever. I assured them that tutorials would go on every morning from 6:30 until 7:15, and every afternoon from 2:45 until 4:30. They liked this very much, and assured me that their little darlings would be scooting into my classrooms at those times. I had one student in this morning at 6:05.

In other news, I had no water yesterday morning. I must take this opportunity to brag about what an amazing school I have. I got to school, shampoo and soap hopefully in tow, thinking that I would seek out a shower in the locker rooms during my off period. I happened to walk by my principal's office, and she inquired about how I was feeling (the day before was my first day back after the migraine, and I was not feeling well at all). I told her I was feeling much better, but that I awoke to dry faucets. Immediately, she asked one of the coaches (who happened to be nearby) if I could go take a shower. The coach said that I most definitely could, and if I needed soap, shampoo, anything, including deodorant, she had it and I was welcome to it. A few minutes later, I ran into my foreign language department chair, who said that she had heard (in a gap of about five minutes) that I had no water, and that she had a towel for me. Not only that, but she was more than happy to sit with my class until I got a shower and could get all ready for the day. By that time, it was 6:45, so my students would be showing up in about 25 minutes (they are always so early). I thanked her, showered, and got back up to my room by 7:15.

So, I baked a pie last night and shared it today with my team, principal, and helpful coach.

I hope you guys have amazing co-workers like I have.

Valete,
Magistra

Sub-a-dub-dub.

2008-09-30T15:55:00.000-07:00

Today was the first day I have left my children with a substitute. There was no avoiding it. I woke up this morning feeling alright (with a slight migraine "hang over"), but as soon as my shower was over, BOOM, came another aura. I knew this did not bode well, as I had two auras last night, along with the aforementioned numbness that had not yet happened when I wrote the previous blog. For the record, I had another aura later today as well, around 10:30. I could not drive, nor could I read, so I decided that I should just keep the sub.

Apparently, my school is still standing, and my children were only a little bad. Some of them were (according to a coworker) blatantly disrespectful and disobedient to the substitute. Children, if ever you see this blog, I know who you are, and I am coming for you. Others of my coworkers assure me that the day went fine. I am anxious to see what the substitute said about my class, if he left a note at all (I know it was a male from various reports). If they were bad, it was because I was not there, not because the substitute was inept, or because they are dumb. They are dumb, it is true, but that is not why they were bad. Does that make sense? I'll update you on how tomorrow goes (if anyone, besides my mother and my darling, even reads this or cares).

Once I can drive again, I really must get to the grocery store. I have no ice cream in my freezer.

Valete,
Magistra

Case of the Mondays.

2008-09-29T17:37:00.000-07:00

Today was not as good as Friday. But, every day cannot be perfect, right? Especially when you're wrangling 130 ninth graders. To add to the chaos, I had major heartburn this morning. First period seems to choose days to be collectively uncooperative. Today was one of those days. The heartburn only lasted for my first two periods, thankfully, before it subsided during third period. The kids were working on projects on their own, so I was not the center of attention, and was able to take a minute to breathe.

Seventh period was unusually rambunctious, which I did not mind, as my heartburn was gone, and I was feeling pretty good. They got a little loud, and I had to get on to a few of the regulars, but other than that, nothing significant happened.

I have been grading their first compositions. The first thirty or so (the ones turned in on time) were really good. I was suprised at their ability to find a voice and tell a story without too much direction. The ones I have graded tonight (the ones turned in late) have been less thrilling. Only one or two have impressed me. Of course, I'm also a little grumpy because I am not on the weekend. In addition, my body thought it would be a good day to rebel. I have a wicked migraine, and the words on the screen are disappearing more and more every second. Forgive typos...I cannot actually read very well right now.

This is my first [what I consider] real migraine of the year, meaning, it is my first migraine with an aura. If you do not know what a migraine aura is, go to:

http://headaches.about.com/od/migrainediseas1/a/aura_ache.htm.

They give a pretty good description in the first paragraph of that article. "Visual disturbance" (the way an aura is usually described) is kind of a lame term for what I experience, but whatever. At least I can feel my right side of my body (for now). If this worsens during the night, I am going to have to call in a sub for tomorrow. Lately, my low-grade migraines have been rather frequent, but I have not had any aura (huzzah, right?). I could attribute it to stress, but I think the weather is about to chage, so that could contribute as well. My love being gone is a weight on my poor brain, as is the struggle of being a first year teacher. My brain just cannot handle the additional stimuli of a day with heartburn, an extra department meeting, extra paperwork, etc.

I need a hug.

Valete,
Magistra

Blue Skies...post-Ike happiness!

2008-09-26T14:48:00.000-07:00

Now that Ike is over, and I've been back at school for four days, I have to admit that I don't mind my job a bit. At least, not very much. On Monday, we had a day back at school just for the teachers, so that we could all adapt our lesson plans to the events of the hurricane. I enjoyed my day mostly in the solitude of my room, getting activities together, sending copies to be made, and straightening things up. I am really glad we had that day, because it refreshed me and got me caught up for the rest of the week. Now, Ike seems like a hundred years ago.

On Tuesday, when the kiddos came back, I found myself actually glad to see them! I was surprised at myself, as I had thought that my week back would be full of discipline problems due to the week they had off. One especially delicious moment on that first day back was right before first period, when I had a student tell me that they were so bored already on the second day off of school that they picked up their Latin text (amazing, I know) and began to read the culture sections that we had not had time to cover in class. Imagine my surprise! I don't give these little people enough credit.

On Wednesday, my darling left. He got a job, and is off to the Great Lakes for a month or maybe a little more, depending on this or that. It has been difficult these last two days. The apartment is quiet with out another person's noise, and empty without another person's mess. I lived in it for a month alone before he got here, so it's back to the olden days when I cooked for one. The upside (for me) to his job on the Lakes is that he is in the States, so I get to talk to him, and use Skype. Yay!

All this week, my English students have been writing personal narratives (a.k.a. stories about something that happened to them which they learned from or will never forget). This is their first composition of the year, besides little half-paged warm-ups they've had to write. I've read four or five of them, and am actually really pleased so far. If my pen runs out of ink, it will be because of grammar fixes, but not because of content, which is the most important thing. Some of these kids have had really awful things happen to them, the likes of which I can't even begin to imagine. They seem to take it in stride, mostly, but I would rather they all had perfect childhoods like I had. I guess it builds character...?

Oh, another wonderful moment came regarding the warm-ups we've been doing this week. They have had to copy a sentence with grammatical errors, and then correct it. We then go over it as a class. Today, two students (one in 4th period, one in 7th) asked if we could go back to the half-page prompted writings we used to do before this week's grammar warm-ups. I was really surprised at this, because they would hem and haw, complaining about having to write half a page OMG OMG OMG. It made me very happy to know that they preferred writing to copying.

Ah! Another excited moment for me was in 2nd period Latin. I have a student who doesn't say much, but I know the student understands what is going on, because that student's grades are really good on things we have to do in class where they can't look up information, like on tests and quizzes. Today, we introduced the irregular verb, "to be" (sum). It is a booger. They've never seen an irregular verb, so they panicked a little bit. I made it seem as similar to a regular verb as possible, and they calmed down some. Anyway, the student asked some really great questions, and has been contributing more this week. The student asked what the word is for "to want," and I conjugated volo for the class. When so-and-so asked for the infinitive (velle), I couldn't remember. I looked it up, though. I get to answer fun questions like those in 2nd period because that class is smaller, and we have an extra five minutes for announcements and the like.

In other news, apparently I act like every day is the first day of school, according to one of my students. I won't say where I got the information, but I feel like I should be flattered.

This is a long post, but I must record one more thing. I hate to end on a bad note, and I don't think it will be bad ultimately, so I'll go ahead and put it. I had to admit I was wrong today. Alas (eheu!)! I had let 3rd period use the lap-tops (we have carts with 18 laptops in them and a printer, called COWs, or Computers on Wheels, that teachers can check out and use) to work on various things, then 4th period came in, and a student asked if they were going to get to use the lap-tops. I told the student, "No." Later, I let some kids use the lap-tops, and the student, along wtih two or three other students, called me out on it. I was defensive at first, but then just admitted I was wrong. They settled down really fast, and were content to let it go. One student, who had been especially offended by my misdeed, got a personal apology for the confusion regarding the computers. I'm glad I admitted my mistake rather than steadfastly refusing to budge on the matter. Teachers are human too, it turns out.

Valete,
Magistra

Home again, home again.

2008-09-20T08:20:00.001-07:00

Salvete,

I'm on my way back home, via Austin. My dearest friend has a bridal shower today in said capitol city, so after the pre-nuptial festivities, I will be hitting HEB to fill my cooler, then heading east. I am supposed to return to school on Monday, sans students. Lesson re-planning will commence.

Who knows what awaits me upon my return. I assume my milk has exploded in my fridge, and if that is the worst that has happened, then I will be thrilled. My little Christmas lights on my porch are probably gone, but let's hope not. I paid $9.99 for them, so surely they were able to endure through some silly hurricane. Right. I have power, according to my apartment complex, and they've cleaned up the tree debris around the place. Last I heard, there is still a curfew in place in the evenings, but I haven't talked to anyone in a few days, so who knows. It will be nice to get back to the daily grind on Monday, I think.

I had a nightmare last night that I had a whole load of new students, and not enough desks, so many of them had to sit on the floor. The girls were all doing their makeup while I was teaching, and had makeup bags identical to mine, except that theirs were newer, and mine looked a little more worn. My document camera had been replaced by a regular overhead, which was set on a desk, instead of on a cart. My projector was now in a chair-attached-desk (I have chair-detached desks in my room, currently), which folded strangely in the top to reveal a computer control panel of some sort. None of the equipment worked like it should, of course. There were three other teachers in there talking over me and trying to teach what I was teaching. The kids weren't listening, it was so noisy, and everything was just a mess.

Let's hope this is not the case on Tuesday, when the children come.

Valete,
Magistra

Still in exile...

2008-09-16T15:48:00.000-07:00

School is closed through Friday, so I'm an evacuee until next week, at least. I talked to my uncle, and he said that if it is meat, cheese, milk, or bread, you can't get it in our area. People have either gone berzerk and bought everything, or the stores can't get supplies. I didn't ask which it was, but I'm certain it is one of the two. In the mean time, I'm still in Dallas, and frankly, I'm feeling a little lost. I don't live here anymore, but I still feel tied to the city--its sights, its ways, and its people. I don't love Houston. It is messy, crowded, confusing, massy, and ridiculous. But, it is where I live now. It is where my job is, and like it or not, I'm stuck in that job until I can figure out what I'm supposed to be doing. I'm not ready to fully commit to the idea that teaching isn't for me. I am a first year teacher, yet to hit my stride, and it is supposed to be difficult. At least, it isn't supposed to be easy.

And "easy" it isn't.

I want to get back to my apartment, where I am organized, where everything is familiar inside, even if the surrounding city is chaos (not just because of the hurricane, but because that is how Houston is). I want my bed, my room, my posters, my dishes, my couches...I want to check my mail. I feel like I'm living in a hotel on a business trip. I'm living out of my bag. I'm expected to perform certain tasks I'm not used to performing, such as being available to others for "hang out" time in the evenings. I'm used to running my own life, and not having anyone attempting to dictate where I should be, what I should be doing, and to whom I should be speaking at any given time. I don't have very many friends in Houston, and the ones I do have either live too far away to demand my time (another drawback of Houston--it takes a year to get anywhere), or are my co-workers, and are too tired to ask anything of me.

Don't get me wrong, I love being home. I love my parents, and my friends, and everyone I know who lives in Dallas. All I'm saying is, I feel like something of an alien, or a piece of furniture out of place. I find that I can't come here and continue to live seamlessly the type of life I live in Houston, whatever that is. I'm expected to perform. I'm expected to be whatever it was I was before I left. It is trying, not just for me, but for my parents as well. Hopefully by the time I get back to Houston, the city will have returned to some kind of normalcy.

Valete,
Magistra

What is the Latin word for "Hurricane Ike"?

2008-09-13T13:52:00.000-07:00

I have evacuated to Dallas. At first, I played off the impending strike of Ike as media sensationalism, but then I thought, I only have one life, so why not continue to live it in certain safety from the gusts, etc? My dear and I made our way to the Big D on Thursday, as school was closed on Friday, and all activities were cancelled for Thursday afternoon. Expecting to hit major traffic on I-45, we by-passed the gridlock via College Station. Apparently we were ahead of the major wave of evacuees, and even had time to stop at good ole Haiku Sushi for some dinner. Delightful.

I wrote up my first child this week. The aforementioned eloper got his just desserts. I felt more giddy than I probably should have. No, that's not true. I felt every bit as giddy as I deserved to feel. I also spoke with some parents, and several problems that have plagued me since the beginning of school (sleeping student, resistent-to-following-directions-and-turning-in-work student) are now inconsequential, or are on their way to being so. My advice to anyone: just call the parent. It will make a world of difference, and you might find out things you need to know that no one else is going to tell you. Most parents really are interested in their child's education, even if the child is not.

I haven't heard if we are having school on Monday. I'm fairly certain that my part of the city does not have power. My aunt and uncle live in the next suburb over, and they are without power AND water. One of my fellow teachers lives about seven miles north of me, and she has power just fine. I called my complex, and no one answered, which does not bode well, as they are meant to be open today. However, I did not read carefully the "Hurricane Preparedness" notice they sent out, so perhaps they are closed for Ike.

I'll keep you posted on the goings on...

Valete,
Magistra

Unbelievable

2008-09-05T18:04:00.000-07:00

I had a kid escape from class today. No, I'm not kidding.

I've been having trouble with this individual since the individual came into my class about five days ago. The student acts as a distraction to the students surrounding, and it has been getting worse and worse despite my best efforts to redirect and put a stop to this behavior. Today, the students were doing individual work that was more unstructured. They were coloring and that sort of thing, so they were allowed to get out of their seats. I won't go into all the stuff that was going on, but it boiled down to me having a discussion with the student and two other students encouraging him to listen to me. The student smarted off, and eventually I asked the student to sit on his own and work without distracting others. Eventually I coaxed the student into doing this (with the prodding of other students), and let the student be so that the student could work.

Then, I hear someone say "Where's So-And-So-With-Whom-You've-Been-Having-Trouble?" I look up and indeed the person is gone. GONE. WHAT? So I sent an email to the AP in charge of that student's part of the alphabet. We'll see what happens.

Really, do the kids think they are going to get off for this kind of nonsense? It was the last 25 minutes of the day, but that isn't the point. We have cameras. We have email. We have their name, phone number, address, and probably their retina-print, so what do they think they are doing? I guess there is no thinking, which is the kicker. Ok, I'm out for the day. TGIF.

Magistra

Dream a little dream!

2008-08-31T11:20:00.000-07:00

It is only the first week.

It is only the first week.

It is only the first week.

I have to keep telling myself this. Not to sound cliche or anything, but this is a marathon, not a sprint!

Last night was rough! I dreamed about school the whole night. I am fairly certain that these dreams stemmed from my feelings of inadequacy. I feel like I haven't prepared my kids for their test on Wednesday. My passion for teaching English is having a hard time thriving. I know it is only the first week, but I'm pretty sure that my love for Latin has overtaken my love for English. Then again, it could just be my classes? I don't know. Either way, I want to do better this week. My students were not engaged last week. I had them write me letters on Friday rather than doing their scheduled warm-up. I asked them to tell me what I needed to know about them and what I could do to make the class better. Honestly, if I were in my English class, I'd be bored. I'm going to do better this week.

It is only the first week.

It is only the first week.

Valete.
Magistra

"Life moves pretty fast..."

2008-08-27T18:54:00.000-07:00

The first three days of school are over! I've been conspicuously absent from my blog, as I've been extremely busy with getting school started.

In other news, my power went out this weekend, so the problem of me not having a working internet connection became moot. There's a sunny side to everything, I suppose. My boyfriend is here, and that makes me extremely happy. We got to cook together at my aunt and uncle's house this weekend (we certainly couldn't hang around my hotter-than-hot aparment).

My kids are...interesting. I am not sure how much I am allowed to write about them. Just let me say, that I already love them so much...even the ones who are giving me trouble. I assume they just want attention when they act like they do, so I've moved them to the front of the classroom so that they can be as close to me as they seem to want to be.

It is bed time (I am having to go to bed around nine o'clock every night so that I can go to school at 5:45 in the morning). HOPEFULLY now that my internet works, I can update the blog more with fun stories. I have a particularly fun one that happened today, involving an eyebrow ring and vindication, so maybe I'll get that in tomorrow.

Until then...

Valete,
Magistra Sapiens ;)

Olim...

2008-08-17T17:20:00.000-07:00

...I went on a cruise. When going through customs on the way back into the United States, behind me in line were two ladies. Both of them happened to be teachers, so naturally we hit it off. When I told them I was a first year teacher, they just could not contain themselves, sharing advice and stories. One piece of advice they gave me was to write down all of the things no one tells you, and then put it into a book entitled Things No One Told Me. I've been trying to compile a list in my head--unsuccessfully. I haven't yet hit a moment when I had to say to myself, "Agh! No one told me that!" Of course, I don't have students yet, the first week of school isn't over, and I'm still not on contract until tomorrow at 7:30 in the morning. I am confident that the minute my contract starts, the real "stuff" will hit the fan. No doubt it will be fun. Just like the cruise I went on, where everything was F-U-N. Carnival: the funship.

--Magistra

Let it be(gin). Coepiat.

2008-08-16T12:22:00.000-07:00

Salvete, mulieres et viri!

This is my teacher-blog. If you haven't figured it out, I teach Latin (among other things).

I am a first year teacher at a brand new high school.

Orientation started this week, even though I don't start "paid employment" until next Monday (and don't get paid until a month from yesterday). I have also been going to professional development, which I may or may not be getting paid for. But, everyone knows--teachers don't do it for the money. If they did, there wouldn't be any teachers.

Honestly, I've been having a great time learning how to be a teacher. My room is really coming along...my aunt and uncle were kind enough to move a bookshelf from my third story apartment to my second story classroom. They even were kind enough to take me out to dinner.

Having moved to a new city, I am finding that things aren't as easy as they were where I came from. I knew where everything was. My couch fit into my apartment doorway. There was not an insane amount of traffic at 2:30 on a Tuesday afteroon. My phone worked. I'd say my internet worked, but it rarely did, and it is up again in my apartment as of a few hours ago (I was able to fix it, because I got a phone that worked, and thus could call AT&T). Cops were lenient (I got a ticket on Wednesday). My tires were inflated (I got a flat on Thursday).

N.B. I am very happy to be living here. My apartment is clean and safe. People at my job are incredibly supportive and kind. A couch is on its way. I miss my boy friend, yes, but I think we are handling all this very well (especially now that my phone works...). My flat is fixed as of this morning, and I imagine I'll take care of my defensive driving course in a matter of weeks or something...it's been four years since the last one, so I don't recall much about how long these things take.

I plan to keep you all updated on what is going on. I won't be giving any student names, and I probably won't tell any scenarios that would give away who all was involved. Thus, the blog might be a little bland for a while, until I get a few classes of kids up a few grades to where it doesn't matter what stories I tell. I hope you'll bear with me, as I'll need all the support I can get.

Vale,
Magistra

"Anything you want to be, you can be. You can be just what-all you want." -Mary Pereira, Midnight's Children by Salman Rushdie